“How Do You Get Someone To Ask You Out?”


Japanese asked how they would try to get someone they have their eye on to ask them out offer up a list of tactics considered likely to elicit the desired advance.

The ranking (votes):

1. Increase the frequency of your mails (10581)

2. Try to appeal based on free time (5339)

3. Keep talking to them about their interests (4466)

4. Smile and touch them (3600)

5. Invite them to discuss something (1697)

6. “Body touch” (1479)

7. Other (1342)

8. Invite them to an event organised by your friend (1033)

9. Dress like them (316)

Sadly there is a fine line between a displaying a flattering interest in exchanging mails with someone and outright stalking or harassing them – although this is at least less risky than the “body touch” method.

Fortunately, with it mostly being women who are placed in this position, and presumably giving these answers, the chances of wandering hands causing offence seem much reduced.

    Post Comment »
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    Avatar of Mitsukuni Haninozuka
    19:14 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    Just be nice and honest :)

    Avatar of Fu
    Comment by Fu
    18:55 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    4. Smile and touch them (3600)

    6. “Body touch” (1479)

    So a smile is what makes all the difference?

    Avatar of Yoshii-kun
    Comment by Yoshii-kun
    19:12 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+0.8)

    Ahegao was the first thing that popped up....

    23:42 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.6)

    Sure does

    Avatar of SOTER
    Comment by SOTER
    20:23 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.6)

    Oh, I like smiling and touching people, but people don't appreciate my efforts. ^_^

    Avatar of Yuuki
    Comment by Wisteria Berlitz
    19:12 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.6)

    well,depends on what kind of "Smile"

    Avatar of Tomoya-san
    Comment by Tomoya-san
    18:53 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    I thought option 1 would be 'show them how high your salary is'.

    Avatar of Yoshii-kun
    Comment by Yoshii-kun
    19:00 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.4)

    9. Dress like them (316)

    And my imagination runs wild...... xD

    Avatar of Yuuki
    Comment by Wisteria Berlitz
    19:08 09/12/2010 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Traps is my first thought...
    before I get down commented,I'll say this

    Avatar of Dokiash
    Comment by Dokiash
    19:09 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.4)

    well, so how long you think your relationship with her last long if just concern about money?

    Comment by Anonymous
    21:14 09/12/2010 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    until your money runs out.

    Avatar of Kudryavka
    Comment by Kudryavka
    19:03 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.4)

    I somewhat doubt someone would do that if they want to keep the money to themselves AND subsequently proceed to take their targets' savings.

    Avatar of Marine-RX179
    Comment by Marine-RX179
    19:24 09/12/2010 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    "I thought option 1 would be 'show them how high your salary is'."
    ...or many zeros on your bank balance. Don't think they would care if you got no salary or income, if you got enough money to blow 10 lives over lol

    Avatar of boneless
    Comment by boneless
    21:32 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.6)

    Plenty of zeroes in my statements. Most of them are leading, but they're still significant digits.

    Avatar of Mizushima 水島
    Comment by Mizushima 水島
    18:51 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    Keep talking to them about their interests......

    sometimes hearing their interest helps....

    Avatar of makkun
    Comment by makkun
    19:09 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    Most of the time, being a good listener helps a lot.

    Avatar of Yoshii-kun
    Comment by Yoshii-kun
    19:21 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.6)

    ^Very true.

    'Slong this heart-to-heart convo doesn't end up as a one-to-one with a wall....

    Avatar of Megidola
    Comment by Megidola
    23:19 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+0.8)

    When you find yourself having a heart-to-heart talk with a wall, it's time to cut down on the drinking...

    23:55 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.4)

    No point cutting down since hes already wasted to be talking to a wall.

    Avatar of Mizushima 水島
    Comment by Mizushima 水島
    22:06 09/12/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    yea but hearing them talk about them sevles is just conceded to me

    Comment by Anonymous
    04:10 10/12/2010 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    ...you're trying to hookup.

    do you know what that means?

    Comment by Anonymous

    Knowing how to stay in the kitchen.

    Avatar of Yuuki
    Comment by Wisteria Berlitz
    21:39 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+0.8)

    I still don't get this joke...
    is it sexist?

    Avatar of Bigall
    Comment by Bigall
    22:21 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.6)

    If a man says it to a woman, yes...

    Avatar of VVayfarer
    Comment by VVayfarer
    05:17 10/12/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    If a woman says it to a man, I'd say it's feminist - so yes, it's sexist both ways.

    Avatar of Yoshii-kun
    Comment by Yoshii-kun
    19:04 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    1. Increase the frequency of your mails (10581)

    They forgot to mention this method might progress and land up in;
    "How Do You Know Someone Is Stalking You Now?"

    Avatar of Mercure
    Comment by Mercure
    19:09 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    Fun fact: I've seen a case of a Japanese dude trying this (1. Increase the frequency of your mails) to get to the point of dating with some girl. Result? She stopped responding and confided in a friend of mine that she felt it was bothersome and in fact a bit intrusive.

    It might work better if the person sending the mails is a girl, but there's always the risk of being seen as too clingy, too desperate or too stalker-ish. Increasing the frequency is fine, but increasing it too much is ruining your chances.

    Avatar of rei_yuriko
    Comment by rei_yuriko
    20:12 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    Body Touch is how I always signal to a perspective partner my interest.

    Avatar of Davoh
    Comment by Davoh
    22:09 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    A girl can touch another girl but a dude can't touch another dude. I've come to the conclusion that a dude can't touch anyone apart from themselves.

    Avatar of Darkrockslizer
    Comment by Darkrockslizer
    19:18 09/12/2010 # ! Quality (+0.9)

    I'm all for Body Touch! What's wrong with Body Touch!

    Comment by Anonymous
    03:09 10/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.8)

    ...and 9. Dress like them (316)

    Crossdressing ?! wtf !?

    Avatar of Neonie
    Comment by Neonie
    21:17 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.7)

    I love the double standard that it's totally ok for a girl to touch a dude but not ok for a dude to touch a girl.

    Avatar of TNinja
    Comment by TNinja
    00:15 10/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.4)

    I'm all in for "Say hello to them every day. In Japan."

    Ooooor I can dress like them.

    Avatar of TNinja
    Comment by TNinja
    00:18 10/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.4)

    I'm all in for "Say hello to them everyday".

    Oooor dress up like them. :V

    Comment by flood
    20:49 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.4)

    Article pic resembles Utsuho ^^

    Avatar of dreadx6
    Comment by dreadx6
    19:53 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.4)

    I think this is a general good list tough i must agree with the above comments as if done in excess there is a chance of seeming too clingy/ a pervert/ or someone who is too loose.
    tl;dr Moderation is your friend!

    Comment by Anonymous
    03:33 10/12/2010 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Well from my experience, my current girlfriend came onto me :) It was a week before her birthday and she is the niece of my best friend for the past 17 years....anyway I get a call 5 years ago, from her, saying her niece will be coming to my state for a short visit. I meet the girl (who was going on 21 at the time) I met her and said to myself, "she's very cute and sweet, but very shy", much like myself (shy). We go on a few casual dates for about 3 weeks...and one particular date, she wore a micro-mini skirt :O .... I saw her and said to myself "Oh MY GOD....she is HOT!" That night on the way back from a nightclub, we are sitting in the back seat of her uncle's car, and she places her hand on my left leg and starts to rub it!! I knew right away that she liked me :) ... about a week after that was her 21st birthday....we all went out to dinner than back to her aunt and uncle's house for cake and wine....well, I finally had the courage (after a few glasses of wine) to ask her if she would like a "birthday Kiss" and without hesitation, she answered yes. We started dating right after that.
    So my point is sometimes it's a very good thing that the woman takes the first step. I just took the second step after her telling me by touching and rubbing my leg that she liked me. We have been together 5 years now. And very much in love.

    Avatar of nanuchan
    Comment by nanuchan
    21:27 09/12/2010 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    So chikan are just persons in love...

    Avatar of Bigall
    Comment by Bigall
    22:20 09/12/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Body touch is part of those manly things that girls like so much.
    If you're insecure, you won't go for body touch, hence you're not manly, hence you're a loser... Well it's not that simple, cause you can't touch a girl without her consent, but it's really important.
    It's important to have a nice conversation, listen to her and be interested (really interested not faking it) in what she likes. It's important to be in contact with her but not to gravitate around her or else she will lose interest in you...

    Comment by Anonymous
    03:15 10/12/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    they forgot 11: kidnap and rape until mindbreak

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:52 10/12/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Sometimes posting anonymously makes me feel human again.

    Also, these charts are lame, if you're interesting to their other person, then they'll ask you out, sometimes it doesn't even require any effort.

    Comment by Anonymous
    04:01 10/12/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    #1 is what the internet called a spammer...

    Comment by Anonymous

    Well, when a girl is touching my penis I'm all for it and I know she wants to fuck then.

    Avatar of BlaqCat
    Comment by BlaqCat
    02:14 10/12/2010 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Likewise, when does "body touching" become "unwelcome advances" (like if the guy she's interested in has a girlfriend)

    Avatar of PewPewPew!
    Comment by PewPewPew!
    02:55 10/12/2010 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Ah, the damn picture somewhat made me think of a Lelouch who underwent gender transplant and is using "mailed geass" on some unsuspecting boytoy.

    Avatar of Neferius
    Comment by Neferius
    08:29 19/12/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Yeah, cause coming off as Desperate ALWAYS gets them in the Mood ;)

    Avatar of King Tiger
    Comment by King Tiger
    19:14 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.6)

    4. Smile and touch them-creeper much?

    6. “Body touch”-train groping action! nice!

    7. Other-I like where this is going~

    8. Invite them to an event organised by your friend
    now its a 3-way! :) friends share

    9. Dress like them-trappin'wut!

    Avatar of Shippoyasha
    Comment by Shippoyasha
    19:12 09/12/2010 # ! Good (+0.4)

    All these are kinda creepy. Dress like them and keep sending more messages? SCARY AS HELL.

    Comment by Anonymous
    04:12 10/12/2010 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    the list is for "stalkers 101"

    Avatar of Otherwise-Six
    Comment by Otherwise-Six
    01:47 10/12/2010 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Yeah, I am a guy and I would be a little weirded out if a girl I knew started dressing like me....

    Avatar of Castian
    Comment by Castian
    05:32 10/12/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    i say first the eye crossing then share interests
    later body touching gently THEN increasing a bit mail activity
    hahahaha but WTF with dressing the same?
    what if shes a schoolgirl? lol
    that'll ruin everything with almost every girl

    Avatar of Riiku
    Comment by Riiku
    04:29 10/12/2010 # ! Neutral (-0.2)

    If a girl came to me and said: "ohai im gonna blow you nao, lay down" I'd go out with her

    Comment by Anonymous

    Or... you can just do this, "wanna for have sex back at my apartment?"

    P.S. With the Indian Accent

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