Pokemon Go Fest 2017 Total Train Wreck

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The first ever “Pokemon Go Fest” (which, according to some, may be the last) held in Chicago’s Grant Park has unfortunately spelled disappointment for the 20,000+ people in attendance as a majority of players were unable to connect to the game – that is if they could even get past the 3 hour queue to get into the tiny park.

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  • Anonymous commented on July 25, 2017 19:27

    You call consle players 'sir'. Jeez, did they stop teaching kids basics?... More

  • Anonymous commented on July 25, 2017 18:06

    Pokemon go to the polls... More


Breath of the Wild: “How to Have Fun With Your Kids!”

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Nintendo has seemingly provided inadequate parents with more advice on how to raise their children in the form of a 3 part mini-series, utilizing the highly popular Breath of the Wild and showing all the great things that parents can do with their kids despite the game being single-player.

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  • Anonymous commented on July 26, 2017 09:13

    Western version will probably show the parents burning consoles at the stake and beating the kids into respecting women.... More

  • Anonymous commented on July 25, 2017 13:23

    Pragmatism. I can respect.... More


Pokemon Go Legendaries Arrive – “Expect Stampedes!”

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Niantic have finally announced that legendary Pokemon will be coming to accident-inducing mobile game Pokemon Go, a surefire way of boosting notoriety for the now significantly less popular mobile title in addition to causing more horrendous accidents due to inattentive players.

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  • Anonymous commented on July 24, 2017 01:38

    Fidget spinners were around long before pogo (over 2 decades ago) they're just more in the news and on store shelves now. Still pointless.... More

  • Anonymous commented on July 23, 2017 16:11

    I thought all these people moved on to fidget spinners... More


Splatoon 2 Launch Day Queue Chaos

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If the sheer popularity (or perhaps scarcity) of the Nintendo Switch is any indication, the launch day for Splatoon 2 has unsurprisingly been met with an equally mind-blowing amount of lengthy queues at various outlets across Akihabara, most of which were forced to create lotteries due to possessing an insufficient quantity of the highly coveted Splatoon 2 + Nintendo Switch bundle.

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  • Anonymous commented on July 25, 2017 00:32

    If you bothered to look at the pictures there is no splatoon 2 game. Its either splat 2 switch bundle, a neon switch or regular switch. All those people are there trying to get their... More

  • Anonymous commented on July 25, 2017 00:30

    Im pretty sure those massive lines are probably to get the switch not necessarily to get the splatoon game. Splatoon 2 has horrible gyro controls... More


Nintendo Switch ROMs Out – “Crack Imminent!?”

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Hardcore homebrew site GBATemp has revealed that the first ROMs for the Nintendo Switch are available, astonishing many as to how quick it was this time around – although they currently cannot be played on a Switch and no emulator exists either.

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  • Anonymous commented on July 25, 2017 00:35

    Remember how fast the wii u was hacked? But how long did it take to hsck the 3ds... buy a 2nd switch and never upgrade it... More

  • Ishmon16 commented on July 22, 2017 21:48

    It was only a matter a time.... More


Nintendo “Will Punish Splatoon Rage-Quitters”

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Those in possession of review copies for the upcoming Splatoon 2 have discovered that Nintendo will be punishing players who consistently leave online matches, a rather shocking development considering Nintendo’s reputation for maintaining a child-friendly atmosphere that caters to casuals.

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  • Anonymous commented on July 22, 2017 07:10

    Dont start a game if you need to go, retard. Problem solved.... More

  • Anonymous commented on July 22, 2017 07:09

    If it bothers you so much that you got blocked from online because you're a worthless cunt shitting the game up for 7 others, maybe you should step back and rethink your life.... More


3000 Queue for 200 Switches

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Hordes of eager buyers queued up at electronics mega-department store Yodobashi Camera in Akihabara for a chance to purchase a Nintendo Switch as part of a special lottery, with it being estimated that over 3000 people lined up – despite its battery-draining bugs and bending problems.

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  • Anonymous commented on July 21, 2017 13:42

    And people say to startreck fans are a bunch of freacks....... More

  • Anonymous commented on July 21, 2017 13:40

    Like the lots of retards in queue for a useless console not?.... More


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A preview image for an upcoming episode of the Minecraft series by comedy duo Yoiko on the official Nintendo channel has been stirring up attention due to a bent Nintendo Switch apparently being visible, yet another problem that several buyers have been experiencing with their Switch and adding onto its ever growing list of aggravating (if largely minor) issues.

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  • Anonymous commented on July 18, 2017 00:27

    Maybe you shouldn't make such an flimsy products... More

  • Anonymous commented on July 17, 2017 06:06

    Its bending RIGHT where the heat pipe is, between the game card slot and the exhaust Its the heating... More


Nintendo Switch Battery “100% to 0% in 2 Minutes!”

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The Nintendo Switch has apparently been giving many buyers a bizarre battery issue, with the battery supposedly going from 100% down to 0% in as little as two minutes – though for some, this is merely a display problem as they can then continue playing for hours despite being at 0 charge.

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  • Anonymous commented on July 14, 2017 18:52

    or just wait for Switch U.... More

  • Anonymous commented on July 13, 2017 06:28

    でも豚はもう死んでいる \ひでぶ/... More


Super Mario Odyssey Caters to Casuals “No Game Overs!”

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A recent revelation unleashed for the next entry into Mario’s adventure, Super Mario Odyssey, has prompted negative reactions from critics as it has been revealed that no matter how many times players die, they will never get a game over – once again reinforcing Nintendo’s known tendency of catering toward the ever incapable casual crowd and young children.

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  • Anonymous commented on July 12, 2017 12:00

    Oh, come on. "You don't have a Game Over Screen" isn't the same as "you can't die". It's a game about exploration and experimentation as far as I can see, and people who has actually... More

  • Chen-04 commented on July 12, 2017 04:52

    Not really.... More


Super Bomberman R “Simon Belmont & Pyramid Head?”

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The rather ancient Bomberman franchise’s latest release, Super Bomberman R, has introduced Simon Belmont and Pyramid Head (from Castlevania and Silent Hill) to the game as playable characters, odd choices for collaboration characters that many will surely regard as a desperate attempt to draw in buyers.

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  • Anonymous commented on July 1, 2017 15:10

    Nice btw, but i still miss hudson...... More

  • Anonymous commented on July 1, 2017 13:40

    fuckonami... More


Shigeru Miyamoto “We Want to Make Anime!”

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Shigeru Miyamoto has revealed his desire to produce anime and other such video content for Nintendo franchises during Nintendo’s 77th Annual General Meeting of Shareholders, no doubt a highly anticipated development amongst fans as well since the last animated Nintendo show seems to have been quite some time ago.

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  • Chen-04 commented on July 23, 2017 20:41

    A proper Nintendo-game would be fucking amazing. Problem is Nintendo doesn't make those anymore.... More

  • Chen-04 commented on July 23, 2017 20:40

    That was a cartoon.... More


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