Chinese TV’s “Mysterious Mushroom” Actually Onahole
- Categories: International, News
- Date: Jun 20, 2012 02:47 JST
- Tags: Bizarre, China, Dutch Wife, Food, Mass Media, Onanism, Video Gallery
The Chinese media has been utterly humiliated after reporting the discovery of a mysterious mushroom, only have it pointed out to them that it was actually a discarded artificial vagina.
According to the reports, the “mysterious mushroom” was found down a village well and soon became the subject of wonderment in the local media, where it was shown floating in a bucket and being measured and handled with much reverance:
Unfortunately, it appears none of the reporters or villagers were familiar with (or would own up to knowing about) the technology of artificial vaginas, and so their theories that it might be a legendary mushroom said to grant immortality were shattered humiliatingly once the video was exposed to the wider world.
Needless to say, online they have been reduced to a laughing stock.
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Hicks are the same the world over.
I'm not sure which makes them look dumber... not being able to identify the onahole or believing in a mushroom that grants immortality...
Maybe they believed it grants immorality, and Sankaku made a typo.
I apologize, I accidentally voted you down. Nice one.
May be it won't grant immorality, but that solve one the issue of being alone forever part.
Someone posted above saying the small hole is for the "first time"... So this has not been used before being discarded!?
It's either "Rightfully Theirs" or "Best/Smartest/Fastest in the World" for them.
This time, while trying to claim one of the titles above, it backfired hilariously.
"I hadn't known there were so many idiots in the world until I started using the Internet."
Stanislaw Lem.
That being said, if no one here had Internet half of them would behave just like those villagers.
Eating the onahole DOES in fact grant you immunity, it said so on 4chan.
I just hope nobody tried to cook it and eat it before they found out.
...or... after they found out, depending on how disturbing they are.
for people used to sewer sauce, soup from the drains, and the like... this must be a gourmet snack
Plenty of protein.
Since it didn't explode, they should have guessed that there was something funny with the "mushroom".
i see what you did there :D
Wait they couldn't tell it was plastic?
They blamed the reporter by saying she was too young and did not know what it was. (She probably didn't know though lol)
She's a female. She's less likely to know but the top is so obvious
They shouldn't blame the reporter alone. Thats not how tv reports work.
Cameraman
Producer
Editor
And also the studio that OK'd it for broadcast
Any one of them could have said something but didn't. They are all as gullible as the rest of that chinese village.
To be honest, I suspect most people wouldn't recognize one, even among frequent Internet users. It's easy to see how something like that could get overlooked.
Somehow I don't think the reporter, or editor were hired for their brains.
Reporter for looks.
Editor for connections.
Cameraman for the ability to hold a camera steady and keep his mouth shut when others are saying dumb shit.
"Please forgive our reporter, she is too young to know what food is."
well, how could she know? has she used an onahole before? that goes the same for the rest of the crew it seems XD
UHUhuaa as they do not know what it is?
It is precisely manufactured there and shipped to Japan ..
It is possible that the village is so remote that does not have internet or porn magazines.?!
I think they call the reporter for fun and the donkey fell over, like the apparitions of ovinis or supernatural in the end 95% is pure scamming.
I want to see how they will find the former owner :P
That's a great idea! Get a weird dildo and call some of those supernatural gulible guys claiming that you have some alien/mutant plant/fungus. Bonus points if he have a site/work on some supernatural magazine!
its china.... every thing is plastic and explodes
Even the women?
Especially the women.
I hope they didn't use it afterwards.
Ironically it's 'Made in China'.
And it's the Vitiligo special edition, so it's rare even if it doesn't grant immortality... or does it XD
Nobody's that stupid, they cant even tell the difference beetween mushroom and piece of plastic? This is sancom hate propaganda
More like a publicity stunt by the guys who made the video?
Well, the stuff they use to make these things does feel weird... It's not like normal plastic or rubber.
Onaholes aren't made of plastic dumbfucks
Actually, yes, they are. It's just a 'special' kind of plastic that feels like human flesh.
That said, who was so ignorant there that they couldn't find out what this was at first glance. Even I, as an American, knew what an Ona-hole was BEFORE I had the internet.
If you are going to be pedantic, it's a polymer, not a plastic.
But it's still not organic
oh look, a butthurt chink trying to protect china's non-existent reputation.
If it was anyone else, I would think twice because I would believe there was no way they could have confused a plastic for real thing...but with a chinese, this level of stupidity is actually believable, seeing as how dim-witted they are.
That's priceless! And these are supposed to be the people who are going to rule the world?!
If you mean the villagers, the answer is no.
Rulling the world has nothing to do with competence. See: Hitler.
Mario hits "?" block
Out pops this "mushroom"
<__>
"Here we go!" "Yahoo!" "Yipee!" "Whaha!" "Ima tired!"
this made my day, rofl... x3
Mario 64 sounds xD
"1 up" indeed.
"and so their theories that it might be a legendary mushroom said to grant immortality "
This is the biggest problem I had with the article and one of the reasons I have an issue with Chinese. Let's not test anything. Something new, It makes us immortal!
I hate claims where people don't prove crap.
However I am pointing and laughing at their mistake.
A "Shroom" that makes your dick larger! I'm in!!
You mean I can finally grow my dick big enough to enjoy fucking a needle hole? SWEET!!
Those things are supposed to be very elastic and usually only the entrance is that small (so you can break it the first time you use like a virgin plastic vagina)
But one of the ones I got was really all the way tight and it was impossible to use that.
Lube is your friend.
baby oil solves all sorts of problems, virgin
You shouldn't call someone a virgin when you are giving them advice on how to use a plastic vagina.
Was there live sperm still inside it?
What if the shroom explodes?
Then the term "dickless" will apply to you.
This shroom is supposed to make YOU explode... inside of it.
SEXIEST COMMENT EVAH
its the legendary mushroom because its the first artificial vag made in china that doesn't explode
AWWWWW YEAAAAAA
Don't forget the pussy in other side XD
Old_Nash
You seem a little confused...