“Finally – You Can Lose Your Virginity To Your PC!”


Virginal onanists are hailing the advent of the USB Onacon as a major step forward, with at least one reviewer praising it as “like having sex” and others noting that this brings them tantalisingly close to finally being able to lose their virginity to their PCs…

The “USB Onacon,” detailed in a previous article:


The review (of sorts):


“I bought the USB Onahole… the box is huge!”

“We want to see inside!”

“What happened to him?”

“He died already?”

“Should we wait until he finishes his sage time?”


“Sorry guys, I was polishing up my magnum in the bath!”

“There’s a box inside the box, very classy!”

“Show us what’s inside that box!”

“Open it already!!!”

“Can you play it online yet?”

“I think a system where the onahole comes with an anal dildo and you can both use them together online, with the winner the one who lasts the longest, could really sell…”

“That sounds like paradise for the analists!”

“This technology is going to keep progressing and eventually we won’t need 3D women at all.”


“Ho, it comes with its own lotion too!”

“How I envy you.”


“Onacon-chan is surprisingly simple though.”

“Just how much tissue do you have in there?”

“This is the actual onahole. You have it symmetrically docked with onacon-chan. The shape is different from normal so it won’t fit any others.”


“The package says it is a perfect recreation of the feel of virgin vagina…”

“Vi-virgin, you say?”

“Looks too small.”

“Well, it’s a virgin so that can’t be helped!”

“The game finally installed.”



“Looks hard to wash though.”

“I ran the game, and a girl suddenly appeared before me!”


“Too many jaggies…”


“Now to make a character… there’s so many clothing options, it’s confusing!”

“Try Googling 3D Custom Shoujo and you’ll be a happy man.”



“What happened to him!”

“He’s probably still stuck making his character. It does that to novices.”


“Welcome back. Now write the review already.”

“My thoughts on the onahole part are mixed. Using it is certainly exciting. It feels like sex. But if you thrust deep there’s no reaction, it’s a little disappointing.”

“Sure you’re not just too small?”

“So it’s no good for small guys? That rules me out.”

“Seriously? Let me just go cancel my order.”

“Upload a pic of the girl you made.”

“Like this:”


“Just what some virgin would want. Busty, black-haied, megane…”

“Shut it. I lost it ages ago!”

“So how was it? Glad you bought it?”

“I’m thinking it was pretty good.”

“Finally, the age where we can lose our virginity to our PCs has come!”

Available now.

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