“The Difference Between American Sex & Japanese Sex”

usa-vs-japan-by-tuna-empire

Japanese 2ch denizens have been pondering the differences between Japanese and American sex, such as they know of it.

The exchange:

“American girls want to look at it in them whereas Japanese girls don’t want to see it at all.”

“Iku! < Japan

Come on! < USA”

“I’m coming! [kuru] < USA

I’m going! [iku] < Japan”

“Yes! Oh yes!! < USA

No! This is no good! [“Dame, konna no dameee!”] < Japan”

“Japan = sexual activity

USA = active sports”

“In American fellatio they don’t look at your face, they stare at your penis whilst licking it.”

“When foreigners are having sex it doesn’t feel like the woman is being raped. It’s more like two people are fighting each other on an equal basis. Like a sport, in fact.”

“Japan = silent, USA = BGM.”

“Are American girls all bitches?”

“I homestayed in the states… the host’s 17-year-old daughter kept pestering me for it. I remember thinking they look prim and proper – but it’s really a nation of bitches!”

“I want to do a blonde if only once! Tell me what you thought.”

“Well, I was a virgin but of course she wasn’t. Her nipples were pink and of course she was blonde. She was a single daughter but she came onto me and we starting touching one night, she took my hand and put it on her breast herself.”

“You say ‘of course she was blonde’ but most blondes there aren’t even natural?”

“The whole family was blonde. [A lengthy account of his encounter follows]”

“I’m just going to go and home stay in the US!”

“As a twenty-something virgin this makes me sad and envious.”

[He continues]

“Damnnnn! Arrrrgh!”

“It’s a lie! Keep going please!”

[He continues]

“Hey, what are you doing – keep writing!”

“What are you doing!”

“What, it’s finished!?”

“I homestayed in Australia but nothing like that happened…”

“I can’t imagine American women doing it like Japanese women though.”

“Americans do it from behind, Japanese tend to pile up. That’s because Japanese penises are shorter. Americans are longer, but their weakness is that their penises are softer [many Japanese seem to be under the impression that foreign penises are softer than Yamato ones].

Hard Japanese penises are really popular with American women! Ask some of the women at American bases!”

“Japanese seem to derive a lot of their pleasure from some sense of sexual shame they get from the act.”

“The passion of American sex is wonderful.

It varies with the individual, but generally Japanese women just act as if they’re being raped and defiled, and seem to become intoxicated from that rather than the sex itself. Though that has some merits too, I suppose.”

“You lot only know what you’ve seen in pornos.”

“How else would you know anything about American sex?”

The usual disclaimers about these statements largely being based on Japanese viewing tawdry American porn apply – although given the source it seems their experience of Japanese women is likely to be just as limited, so perhaps this evens out…


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    380 Comments
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    Avatar of paelresxon
    Comment by paelresxon
    23:21 31/07/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    how come no one mention that Japanese girls have weird pixelated vaginas whereas american girls have completely bald ones

    Comment by Anonymous
    03:20 02/08/2011 # ! Good (+0.8)

    its like Klingons not having wrinkly heads for a time, it's a terrible affliction & they don't like to talk about it, especially not with outsiders

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:25 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.9)

    These Japanese seems to know as much about women as they do nuclear safety.

    Comment by Anonymous
    20:53 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.8)

    rofl give this man a damn medal

    Comment by Anonymous
    19:34 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.7)

    *claps* WE HAVE A WINNER, WE HAVE A WINNER.

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:25 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.6)

    This comment just won the internet.

    Comment by Anonymous
    02:36 01/08/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    epic comment detected

    Comment by Anonymous
    14:57 03/07/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    It's funny and sad at the same time.....

    Avatar of Castian
    Comment by Castian
    02:13 01/08/2011 # ! Neutral (-0.2)

    a common error (that i hate actually) its that Japanese ppl think USA blondes are big breasted every time, which is, false, totaly false, caucasic women are second to asian in flatness. (by total populaion, i love japanese cuties, its my dream to have a threesome with my wifey and a japanese girl)

    Not only breast,but ass too, USA caucasic girs have by a huge majority; FAKE bodies or fatsies if having a voluptuos constitution.

    And whatever voluptuos girl its there, its NOT originally from the USA or it is black.
    Again, a huge majority, there MUST be outhere an excemption...
    Or highly confused with Ausralians who has the highest population of DD cups to 1/2 the girls.

    by the way, by "Americans" they stupidly meant "USA", which i find it insulting, i'm from Mexico, and Latin girls are mostly, slender big boobed and round assed, going to the next street store its an enjoyable show.

    Comment by Anonymous

    Hey, fuck yourself. I know about your reconquista movement and you can eat it, and the horse you rode in on. Of course people say (NOT stupidly) America when they mean the United States. That's called a colloquialism. No one says America when they intend to say North America. If they did, they would say North America or the Americas.

    Comment by Anonymous

    At least their porn is a whole lot better :P Isnt THAT what matters?

    Avatar of Kuraudo
    Comment by Kuraudo
    15:32 31/07/2011 # ! Neutral (-0.2)

    Careful, you're implying that they know a lot more about women than any of us believed prior to your comment!

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:42 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.9)

    "Hard Japanese penises are really popular with American women! Ask some of the women at American bases!”"

    OH MY LAWL WTF IS THIS SHIT? ROFL

    Avatar of Hayate
    Comment by Hayate
    15:52 31/07/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    they're all wizard class people, so they knows...

    Comment by Anonymous
    09:14 01/08/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    For reals, some of the best art came from those of wizardry.

    Avatar of VVayfarer
    Comment by VVayfarer
    20:41 02/08/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    They got magic in their fingertips, that's why.

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:54 31/07/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    The reason why American bases still exist in Japan of course.
    //Joke//

    Avatar of aarond12
    Comment by aarond12
    03:44 01/08/2011 # ! Good (+0.6)

    We're just doing our part to improve the birth rate in Japan...

    Avatar of PirateKing
    Comment by PirateKing
    10:48 31/07/2011 # ! Quality (+0.8)

    Thats some virgin otaku's wet dream but nothing else.

    But I guess when your tool is too short to actually dangle it does give the illusion of being "hard" all the time...

    ;-)

    Comment by Anonymous
    20:14 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.8)

    A large cock actually needs more blood to stay erect and usually is a bit limper than a small one.

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:49 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.8)

    Maybe, but I'll take a "softer" American penis than a tiny Japanese one any day.

    Comment by Anonymous
    14:05 01/08/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Oh god. I can't even imagine a 24/7 boner. *shudder* So painful!

    Comment by Anonymous

    Pay attention not to get HIV you American sick bastard

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:50 01/08/2011 # ! Good (+0.8)

    8:38 is offended because he has a tiny cock.

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:49 01/08/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    What does HIV have to do with anything? Y U MAD THO?

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:16 31/07/2011 # ! Drivel (-0.7)

    Closet gay.

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:38 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.8)

    I'm sure women and gay men would both prefer that. So either way........

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:48 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.6)

    The comment from someone who doesn't know Okinawa is home of geijin bars, where Jap girls flock to GI cock.

    Avatar of Kuraudo
    Comment by Kuraudo
    15:30 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.6)

    Any American base is basically a harem with female servicewomen throwing themselves at anything that moves. I have no reason to believe it's any different for our overseas bases in Japan.

    Comment by Anonymous
    18:35 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.6)

    Mystery Canadian reporting for banging sir.

    No jap will ever be able to tell the difference.

    Avatar of Elcachetondelpuro
    Comment by Elcachetondelpuro
    23:54 31/07/2011 # ! Neutral (-0.2)

    Yeah, you only need to be caucasian enought ;)

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:36 01/08/2011 # ! Good (+0.6)

    how popular can a hard toothpick be?

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:57 31/07/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    hope somebody has a camera when he goes to the US

    Avatar of Bravo
    Comment by Bravo
    10:57 31/07/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    In an American base you go rolfcopter

    Avatar of Fapping Time
    Comment by Fapping Time
    11:06 31/07/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    not only did this article make me laugh, but you sir gave me a good chuckle too...
    thanks...

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:49 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.8)

    "American women are all bitches."

    A bitch is a bitch no matter what the country. Lest we forget.

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:41 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.8)

    he mad, cause he's a wizard.

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:18 31/07/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    You're a wizard, Harry.

    Avatar of Ota-Kool
    Comment by Ota-Kool
    12:34 31/07/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    Naahh His name probably Larry as in Larry Flynt the crippled sex wizard.

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:33 31/07/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    Harry become Meguca?

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:35 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.6)

    Oh, man.. I hope this whole 'you'll be a wizard if you don't lose your virginity by age x' thing stays, it's a great insult for the internet.

    Comment by Anonymous
    15:28 31/07/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    I always find it funny people assume if you hate on women you are virgin. I have a friend who gets laid more than anyone else also the biggest misogynist around.

    Comment by Anonymous
    03:32 01/08/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    I've seen this time and time again: a lot of American girls crave mean guys and they seem to not care (or almost get off on it) when they get treated like shit. That's just how it is. Nice guys get way less trim than the assholes. That's a simple fact, at least in the USA. My guess is that it has a lot to do with that whole Alpha Male thing, with females being genetically hard-wired to want to make babies for the biggest badass in the pack.

    Avatar of VVayfarer
    Comment by VVayfarer
    21:25 02/08/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    06:26

    Being an asshole often IS hot, no matter how 'ugly' you are---hell, being a jerk can compensate for lack of confidence as well.

    Comment by Anonymous
    06:26 01/08/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    19:28
    Yeah that's your wet dream. No girl would let you near her. Women will sleep with assholes if they are HOT. Not just some below average horny moron.

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:28 01/08/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    You know... us girls tend to think the EXACT same things about some of you guys. So long as the woman's hot, you'll fuck anything, and what not. It seems to be all alot of guys care about, or at least that's the impression we get. So I wouldn't restrict that opinion to just women. Guys are just as bad, if not worse, considering guys are more visually oriented.

    As for myself, I'll take a decent guy with decent looks ANY DAY over some good-looking asshole. Really... the women you're referring to aren't worth your time anyway. There ARE some decent women out there so long as you're willing to find them.

    Comment by Anonymous
    19:28 31/07/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    irls are all filthy whores, and if you meet the right one you can verbally express that too, while jackhammering her senseless.

    Comment by Anonymous
    16:05 31/07/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Girls don't care about that if you're good for a lay. They get off, then go find someone else. No big deal.

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:26 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.7)

    These are people on 2ch none of them ever had sex. FACT

    Comment by Anonymous
    07:44 01/08/2011 # ! Good (+0.6)

    I just wonder why placing a guy's hand on your breast makes you a bitch. Virginal guys are annoying with how shy they can be sometimes. Anyways, slutty I could see... but a bitch?

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:51 01/08/2011 # ! Good (+0.6)

    You can see slutty from a girl putting your hand on her breast? You're no better than that guy.

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:53 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.6)

    He thinks American women are bitches because they like sex and aren't afraid to ask for it? I think his priorities are in the wrong place!

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:03 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.7)

    Isn't that what defines a bitch though? Not specifically only Americans.

    Comment by Anonymous
    14:45 31/07/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    I've always heard the terms differentiated as such:

    A slut is a chick who'll fuck anybody.

    A bitch is a chick who'll fuck anybody but you...

    And of course a whore is a chick who'll only fuck if you pay her. That one's a pretty solid definition, but you can certainly argue as to what constitutes "payment".

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:06 31/07/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    In America it's usually a woman with a poor/negative attitude. I don't know about other countries. It usually never has anything to do with sex. You wouldn't typically call a sweet girl who likes sex a bitch.

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:36 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.7)

    No, no. That's why they specifically say "bitches AND whores". A slut/whore likes sex a little too much, a bitch is a woman with a foul attitude.

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:36 31/07/2011 # ! Good (+0.6)

    11:23
    Your friends + movies =/= most women in reality

    Comment by Anonymous

    I know a lot of girls who call themselves bitches, because they love sex. You know, the saying "Bitches & Whores!"(referenced)

    In movies, when someone says "You Bitch!", its either for having sex with someone else or the girl is acting poorly.
    I guess we can say it's both.

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:04 31/07/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    The usage of the word 'bitch' in Japan is a bit different, not necessarily an insult.

    Avatar of Artefact
    Comment by Artefact

    I've yet to see it used in a positive sense. It might be closer to "slut" than "bitch" in the English usage, but a compliment it is not.

    Avatar of Leon Cloud
    Comment by Leon Cloud
    10:02 01/08/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    they kinda use mesubuta for that

    Avatar of Kuraudo
    Comment by Kuraudo
    15:31 31/07/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Our women *are* different though. Just like our loser population is a lot smaller than Japan's, the sexual activity of our women is probably different. I don't know if that means they're more active than the Japanese, but I would hazard they are.

    Comment by Anonymous

    the girl wanted to get it on and he calls her a bitch? apparently, he thinks a nice girl is one that only wants him for his money...











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