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“What Do You Think of Nail Art?”

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The noted affection Japanese women have for “nail art,” and the complete disgust with which most men apparently view it, has lately been exciting opinions online.

The question was prompted by a woman dining with her “nailist” (the Japanese term for beauticians specialising in such manicures) friend, who had black nails. An old man dining nearby apparently asked her if she was having liver problems.

This prompted her to pose a question to men online – “A question to men. What do you think of female nail art?”

It may be helpful to provide some examples for those unfamilar with the practice:

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Aya Hirano is a devotee and provides much regular updates on the state of her claws:

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Even the questioner admitted she expected a negative response, and she was not disappointed:

“Women who don’t do it are far superior. If my girlfriend did it I’d definitely get her to stop. I can’t imagine they can even keep their homes clean. Nail art is a fashion minus.”

“It’s unhygienic, they surely can’t do housework, and it makes me think they aren’t interested in doing anything. I can’t see any positive aspect.”

She seems intent on ignoring these criticisms however:

“Certainly excessive nail art would look as if it’d prevent you working, but I feel fellow women who leave their nails in ‘nude colour’ without even painting them are negligent.

If I’m exchanging business cards with another woman, if they have nice nail art and I have none, I feel strangely embarrassed, and the nail art can also serve as a conversation starter. so there are other aspects.

Nail art is an expression of a woman’s desire to be pretty. I think men should be more understanding of it.”

The matter soon passed to 2ch under the title of “Woman: ‘I’m trying hard with my nail art but I’m still not popular with men!’ Men: ‘Natural nails are best’ Woman: ‘Impossible. Men are incomprehensible.'”

Predictably, 2ch (and most probably men in general) is all but unanimous in loathing the hideous talons and their grotesquely tasteless patina of encrustations:

“Gross.”

“They look like witches.”

“Nail art is something women do to please themselves. There is no man who likes it.”

“Keeping your nails pristine is all well and good, but encrusting them like that is just creepy.”

“Painting them is OK, but I wish they’d stop gluing beads and stuff on to them like some horrible insect’s eggs.”

“Looking at those horrible talons festooned with decorations just makes me want to tear them off.”

“If she lets you do her who cares what she does.”

“What about having a woman with nails like that give you a handjob though…”

“That lot can’t wash their hands properly, it’s unhygienic for sure.”

“Why do they do this?”

“Please tell me they don’t try to cook like that.”

“It’s like a brightly coloured poisonous frog. It’s bright colouration is a warning not to eat it. They are signalling to us not to go near them as they are poisonous, so let’s not.”

“Those nails make we want to puke. Could never marry a woman like that.”

“It’s not for men. It’s just something to let them quarrel over who is cutest amongst themselves.”

“Why are men and women’s ideals so different now.”

“If there’s a hole the nails hardly matter.”

“It’s just something for them to show off to other women and feel smug about.”

“It doesn’t deserve the ‘art’ appellation.”

“If she’s cute I can overlook it.”

“Who looks at their nails?”

“They can’t so much as open a can, bottle or even onanise… it’s like having a disability.”

“Having long nails is gross in the first place.”

“If my lovely Mio had nail art I’d drop her.”

“Women’s ideal: a bitch with brown curly hair, fake talons, scantily clad and bedecked with accessories.

Men’s ideal: A natural belle with long straight black hair, no makeup.”

“Brown hair and nail art cost a fortune and consume huge amounts of time. Men hate them and the only one who benefits is the beautician industry. Idiot women need to give it some thought.”

“If they ever have kids they’ll stop so as not to harm them due to maternal instincts, so don’t worry. Or so my wife says.”

“If men started doing art on their penises I wonder if they’d understand.”

“Nail art is an indication of emptiness. If she did any work or practical activity, she’d not be able to have it. She’s making an appeal based on having no work or sense of practicality – I can’t think what is appealing about such a woman though.”

“They just do it out of self-satisfaction, leave it at that.”

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