China “World’s Happiest Nation”
- Categories: International, News
- Date: May 30, 2011 11:55 JST
- Tags: Bizarre, China, Comparison, North Korea, Politics, Statistics, USA
China has been judged the world’s happiest nation in a new international ranking of national welfare.
The ranking, as compiled by the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea:
1. China (100 points)
2. North Korea (98 points)
3. Cuba (93 points)
4. Iran (88 points)
5. Venezuela (85)
Last at 203rd is the “American Empire” with a pathetic 3 points.
North Korea’s high placement is attributed to the fact that “the state provides free housing, food, clothing healthcare, and other necessities, whilst jobs are allocated by the state so there is no worry of unemployment.”
Incidentally, the capitalist roadsters at the OECD recently harnessed the power of flowers to rank Canada as the all-round best off running dog nation:










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"I feel happy!!!!"
Who do they expect will actually believe this? "You're happy!", "I am?", "Yes! Yes you are!", "Can I leave?", "No!", "How about some internet access.....?"
Oh, don't let them have internet. If they do they'll learn that they're not as well off as they were lead to believe.
they have internet. it's just so censored they might as well not have internet. keep in mind they kinda need internet to farm our gold.
Shippoyasha, I don't think you really understand China at all... it's a nation of great extremes. Generalizing it is nearly impossible.
Ah, sorry. I was trying to refer to North Korea alone and I forget we were talking about China. XD
But yeah, China's major problem is the censorship and governmental crackdown that is one of the most violent in the known world.
It's kind of a funny thing since female CEOs are on a major rise in China. But that's like... one of the very few progression their social rights have had.
I can only blame the draconic government. I feel for the Chinese and NK people too.
They DO NOT have computers though.. Did you even see how their 'videogame arcades' are? They use the machines from the 70's and it's all knockoffs and bootlegs.
A shocking 100% of their 'wages' is coupons and 'necessity' allowances. All other profit goes straight to the government. So basically, their peoples have little to NO access to hobbies, no less foreign ones, EVER.
I think you'd have to worry about the ability to have a computer and the ability to have a connection before worrying about the net censorship.
If not China backing up a government like Kim's, it'll be much easier. Things should be done 50 years ago.
They have computers
Its where 90% of the Hacking comes form lol
State owned hacking
A prospering industry determined on stealing defense secrets from certain airplane companies we know recently
Now now, I'm sure the CEOs of companies working with their goverment can do all the foreign hobbies they want...
On the contrary I come from China and it really isn't that bad.
North Korea have an intranet.
ignorance is bliss...
War is peace
Freedom is slavery
Ignorance is strength
We are little tiny nothings on a miniscule ball of nothing, floating in a great and enormous cosmic nothing.
War is nothing
Peace is nothing
Freedom is nothing
Slavery is nothing
Ignorance is nothing
Strength is nothing
All your failures and triumphs, all your joys and sorrows, all your hopes and dreams, your nightmares and despairs, all your loves and hatreds are but a passing of energy that vanishes as soon as it came, passing back into the infinite nothing.
Fuck your existence, it's not worth anything, because the entirety of it all is just a big delusion. In 'reality' all that there is in the universe is nothing.
You know that's quite applicable to anyone in metaphorical sense.
Nationalists, Racists, Sexists, Age-ists, Weeaboo's, Japanophiles, Homophobes, Xenophobes etc...
There is nothing but decay.
Nurgle is right.
So as a mindfuck
Would the existence of only nothing mean it is something
you forgot 2+2=5
/人◕ ‿‿ ◕人\ he's right your existence is pointless. so just make a contract with me and have fun being a mahou shoujo!<3
Ahh, classic
@anon 14:52 As long as the ignorant is stupid enough
Ignorance always win if the ignorant is stupid, hence their path towards destruction.
They're only happy because they'd be shot if they said they said they were unhappy.
you mean they're happy that they're not shot yet.
If they where really unhappy they won't care for that bullet in the head =D
no, if they said they were unhappy, they'd be sent to prison to mine gold for us american gamers
someone else will instead
Someone could always fill the survey for them
But then they couldn't fill in the survey.
As a Cuban I can say that everyone except the communist which is probably 90% of the nation would rather not live in Cuba and are in no way happy with their welfare.
Exactly!
Besides, Mao = SATAN!
毛泽东==希特勒
mao = devil, satan = satan
Jeez get it right, nubcake.
No, mao = devil, satan = santa
You get it right, nubcake.
DO NEVER smear the great communist Korea!! Our great leader says that we are happiest in the world, so that's it!!! We are the happiest people on the world!!! By the way, what is "surveyor"?
Korea? Communist? Are you trolling or are you just completely retarded?
He's talking about North Korea. South Korea is sane and normal.
Yup China's the happiest alright. Even the things are happy enough to explode.
They're bursting with joy.
even their melons do
Since China is so happy, we NEVER have ANY suicides in our country...
Because there's a huge pressure acting against your weight, and the pressure is explosive gases waiting to be released explosively.
saw on the news that they have rock hard watermelons now. it wouldn't burst even if u stand on it.
Couldn't contain their excitement?
=P
Even Toilets!
even the chairs
They should ask the citizens if they think it's the happiest place on earth.
Wow they found enough happy Americans to get 3 points.
I thought most of us were spoiled enough that we could have a job that paid 1 million an hour, be followed around all day by girls who give blow jobs on demand, never have to pay taxes, invent food tastier then has ever been made with 0 calories, live in 50 acre mansions and still find something to bitch about everyday.
Isn't that what makes America great? We're greedy bastards who are never satisfied.
America, fuck yeah.
Yes. The fact that we're never satisfied is the reason that we do great things.
Necessity is the mother of invention.
Or plagiarism in China's case.
What's funny is how this has all come full circle.
In the Past:
China Invents > Japan Copies and Later Improves
America Invents > Japan Copies and Later Improves
Europe Invents > Japan Copies and Later Improves
Currently:
Japan Invents > Everyone Copies and Improves...Well Some Do.
America Invents > Japan Copies...Improvement?
China Invents > ....*Double Take*
Europe > WTF Guys?
india Invents > china Copies and Later Improves
French Invents > canada Copies and Later Improves
Britain Invents > U.S. Copies and Later Improves
All countries are copying.
Greedy FAT bastards
Fuck yayeah!
Does this mean Americans are RAGEEEEEEing?