Top 10 Qualities Essential for Love


Japanese asked what they consider to be the indispensable prerequisites for love supply a suitably soppy ranking.

The ranking, with votes cast for each:

1. Empathy (7605)

2. A first encounter (3608)

3. Money (2852)

4. Excitement [“tokimeki”] (2793)

5. An open and honest heart (2106)

6. Fidelity (1507)

7. A spirit of compromise (1449)

8. Perseverance (1280)

9. At least some attractiveness (1143)

10. Fate (789)

Those wondering about the relatively romantic (or, perhaps, deficiently pragmatic) nature of the ranking should note the wording – “love” of course does not carry quite the same implication as “relationship” or even “marriage” – previous rankings seem to bear this out.

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    Avatar of Esura
    Comment by Esura
    12:20 10/03/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    LOL @ money being #3 for love. of the gold diggers.

    Avatar of 桂 言葉  死
    Comment by 桂 言葉 死
    12:22 10/03/2011 # ! Quality (+0.9)

    ~ I would have figured that - "Money" - would be #1 on the list...

    Avatar of Elc
    Comment by Elc
    12:47 10/03/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    money > fidelity
    money > honesty
    what? not cool...

    Comment by Anonymous
    21:58 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    You should be happy... money is something you have control over and can change (you can go out and get a job), your personality and attractiveness are who you are and cannot change.

    Comment by flood
    23:44 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Acting lessons and plastic surgery. You CAN change.

    Comment by Anonymous
    14:51 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    unfortunately it isn't, but it seems that is the reality of things regardless of what country you're in

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:43 10/03/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    Keep in mind the survey says "Japanese" not "Japanese women."

    Yet they still kept money up at #3 even with the men presumably skewing the results away from it.

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:41 10/03/2011 # ! Good (+0.7)

    the men are what kept Money at #3!!! all the women probably put money first, but the men put empathy and first encounter!!!

    Comment by Anonymous
    21:40 11/03/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    lol, #3 has just become NON-EXISTANT

    Now in JAPAN ITS

    1. WATER
    2. FOOD
    3. SHELTER

    Avatar of Sylar
    Comment by Sylar
    22:37 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    No matter the gender money would be high because women will say money because they want money and men will still say money because they need money to keep the women. The only difference is that when women say money they mean the other half having them, while when men say money they mean they need to have money themselves. someone of the two sexes being a little selfish and considering itself like a prize that should only demand things in this relationship or is it just my idea?

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:03 11/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    @Sylar: someone of the two sexes being a little selfish and considering the other like collectible prizes?

    The majority of people, of whichever gender they belong, often has selfish interests anyways. That doesn't mean there are no good people. Yet lots of people only knows how to point fingers without really contributing to a change at all (only feeding more hate).

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:54 11/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Yet again...
    Men need a reason to figure out why some chick doesn't want to be with them/dumped them.
    It wasn't your fault for being a twit, it was her fault for being a gold digger.
    Protip: Everyone likes money.

    Avatar of Shippoyasha
    Comment by Shippoyasha
    22:52 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    What does 'demand things' have to do with it? If you're in a relationship, you need to offer the other something. Otherwise it's a take/take relationship (even something like love) with no base. Both sides having self respect and ability to cater to eachother is what relationships are. And that naturally includes money.

    Personally, if I see a guy just sit around and not contribute financially, I would normally see them as a bit useless. Sorry. Nowadays, the same probably could be said of women who can't contribute at least a bit financially.

    Especially the way economy is fluctuating nowadays, I think one great way of showing love and support is.... money. Money to take care of eachother so they can have a quality life. So that their children can have a fun, fulfilling life. So that their children can go to college.

    Avatar of BlaqCat
    Comment by BlaqCat
    13:08 10/03/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    I'm just kind of laughing about money is so high, yet fidelity is so low.

    Avatar of konakona
    Comment by konakona
    23:34 10/03/2011 # ! Quality (+0.8)

    So basically it's cool if you're cheating on your woman as long as you got money =P.

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:24 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Infidelity in Japan is SO HIGH you wouldn't believe.

    Avatar of Aliaus
    Comment by Aliaus
    05:10 11/03/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    well ya can't eat love

    Avatar of LDC
    Comment by LDC

    they love money almost as jews does.

    Avatar of Esura
    Comment by Esura
    12:24 10/03/2011 # ! Quality (+0.8)

    True dat.

    Avatar of Niwa
    Comment by Niwa
    12:56 10/03/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    Oh what a World
    but then again I don't see how Money's something to look for in someone.

    Sure individually a good income is nice and helps keeps things in your life stable.

    Damn It All Accept a man for his Quirks Not his wallet!

    Avatar of Majineko
    Comment by Majineko
    13:49 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    remember Faye from cowboy bebop? take notes people. shes a bit more common than you think.

    Avatar of Eddyak
    Comment by Eddyak
    05:03 11/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)



    Avatar of HouseLife
    Comment by HouseLife
    13:28 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Why isn't 'abs' on that last? It fits the suitably shallow nature included in money.

    Comment by Anonymous
    14:16 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    coz u don't need abs at all to survive but money is so important for the materialistic japanese women.

    Avatar of Lunatique
    Comment by Lunatique
    15:20 11/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Me too, I was sure for money n°1.

    Comment by Anonymous
    22:35 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Why did I read that as 'land of the gold niggers'.
    Stupid internet, you have corrupted my mind.

    Avatar of Shizu's Waki Obsessor: MaidNiac
    21:25 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    ..and looks only scored #9.


    Avatar of anonyme masque
    Comment by anonyme masque
    22:46 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    This survey just confirms what we already know.

    Avatar of Arya
    Comment by Arya
    20:31 11/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Well, Money is bread for the spice called love. You can't survive on spice alone, but i doubt a human could truly be happy eating bland bread every day.

    Of course, love comes in all shapes and sizes. Even your feelings for beautiful figures and dolls is a valid love, if a bit twisted.

    Avatar of Abel Liegod
    Comment by Abel Liegod
    13:30 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    That list is missing "Patience", cuz I know you need lots of that if you wanna love someone!

    Comment by Anonymous
    14:36 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    I highly agree with you there.

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:21 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    They "love" money.

    Comment by Anonymous

    Well, give it some thought. It doesn't necessarily have to mean all of women want millions of yen just for themselves.

    You wouldn't want to marry a dude who relies on his parents' income all the time, right?
    Besides, even if you love some poor guy, there's no future with him even if you marry, because he won't be able to support you much financially, this in turn will also hurt your future offspring, as you won't be able to provide your kids toys and nice clothing, because paying the bills and buying food will be the top priority and after such expense, you'll have no cash left for personal needs. As a result, you'll live the rest of your life as a lower-class wife, married to a good for nothing husband with kids dressed in second-hand rags.
    Besides, having no money leads to loans and loans often lead to debts.

    Not to mention, from my own research, people with low incomes are more prone to becoming alcoholics, because they can't fulfill their needs and desires.

    Avatar of Sylar
    Comment by Sylar
    22:45 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    I won't disagree that money for survival is necessary but why so much demands from the guy? Women wanted equality right? Then why demand that he makes her more than a poor house-wife. Why doesn't she go get money herself? Would she like it if the man thought if he could make him a rich husband before he marries her and if not ignore her? Men don't do that, so why should she do it?
    If a woman still demands from the husband to be the one to save her from a life with debt and low-class house-wife life, then women should stop their equality demands in the workforce and let men take all the jobs to support them, or else having more demands from the man than the woman is completely unfair.

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:16 11/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Well, only 'till recently the world changed a bit and women gained more rights. Can you expect mindsets that has thousands of years of origins to change in a century or so? Lots of women expects men to be the main supporter coz they have always been the only one capable of that (and guess that I don't need to explain how a woman's life depended solely on her marriage back then). Even if there are changes now, it's still not really equal for women in many places in this world. And again, you can't expect something that has been so rooted in humanity to change so easily anyways.

    Yet are men so saintly themselves? Aren't many of them selfish as well? Aren't many of them only interested in sex and can even abandon them if they get pregnant?

    We can spend a long time pointing fingers at each other, that it doesn't change anything to better, but only feeding more hate. The majority of the humans are selfish, regardless the gender. But it doesn't mean good people doesn't exist. But who said that the best things in the world are easy to get? Yet if you keep such mindset and hate, how can you possibly even notice the good things in life?

    If people can be a bit more compassionate and understanding with each other, and focusing on changing the situation together instead of against each other, things would be better.

    Comment by Anonymous
    18:10 11/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    I'm just going to say hahahahaha.

    Its not about changing a mindset.

    Women want their cake and eat it too, why wouldnt they?

    Unless we force them to realize its not going to work anymore, they are not going to willingly give up that advantage they have right now.

    Avatar of Shuubi
    Comment by Shuubi
    13:09 10/03/2011 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    'a first encounter'.
    I know they mean in a romantic sense and all but lolwut, obviously you have to actually encounter someone before you love them, how would you even know they exist otherwise?

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:22 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    Yeah that made me laugh! It's like... well... yeah obviously.... xD

    Comment by Anonymous
    15:37 10/03/2011 # ! Good (+0.8)

    Actually "money" made me laugh.

    Avatar of Sylar
    Comment by Sylar
    22:32 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    No. Empathy is about being able to feel the other person and understand how he/she feels about too. To be able to connect. I'll say it has more to do with the spirit of compromise. If you can understand where the other person comes from and realize their feelings, then you can both make the compromises needed to get along and avoid being too self-centered and oppressive.

    Avatar of Shippoyasha
    Comment by Shippoyasha
    20:21 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Sadly, it doesn't to me. Especially the way our economy is now, it's a total catch to get someone with a stable job at a middle class income. XD

    Empathy sounds about right, but shouldn't that really be clumped together with the first impression? I don't know.

    Comment by Anonymous
    09:26 11/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    lol, I thought the same thing but... wait, we are talking about Japan, so... actually they can be referring to a real encounter, cuz you (I mean, they) can date someone virtually...

    Comment by Anonymous
    19:04 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Shuubi, you ignorant cunt. Stop posting on a man's website.

    Comment by Anonymous
    19:58 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    No, you stop posting on an adults website, kid. If you are not open minded enough to accept a girl in your boys club, you are no an adult, regardless of your age.

    Comment by Anonymous
    17:48 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    third type first encounter, with tentacles, maybe ?

    Comment by Anonymous
    17:03 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    I'm sure this was "deai" or something similar. I think they're referring to the way two people meet, ie what brought a couple together in the first place. Like something romantic.

    In Japan, "meeting" (deai) is another word for dating, or finding someone. That's why deaikei sites (which are notorious for prostitution) are the equivalent of dating sites in the US (except they cost waaaaay more).

    Either that or they're just talking about a good first impression.

    Avatar of TheLAG
    Comment by TheLAG
    18:37 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (-0.2)

    A first encounter?
    Like, when you first meet a certain kind of Pokemon?

    Wild Otaku Appeared!
    Girl threw a Pokeball!
    Wild Otaku has been captured!
    Otaku data has been added to Pokedex...

    Comment by Anonymous

    Must be a Deoxys. that fills the gap of both otaku, pokemon and an alien =3

    Comment by Anonymous

    Uhh not really. It's more like this:

    Wild Otaku Appeared.
    Wild Otaku attacks with "Ultimate Stench".
    Girl runs away.

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:48 04/11/2016 # ! Neutral (0)

    *Girl has fainted

    Avatar of Holy One
    Comment by Holy One
    14:16 10/03/2011 # ! Neutral (-0.2)

    They probably mean 'first sex'. Lol.

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