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“My Boyfriend’s Hiding BDSM Eroge! What Should I Do!?”

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Q: I found a lot of ecchi PC games featuring bondage, confinement and SM hidden away in my boyfriend’s room.

He’s always kind to me, but before there were cases of criminals with these kinds of maniacal tastes, so I was pretty shocked.

My boyfriend isn’t normal is he!? I don’t know how to deal with this…

A 21-year-old female student.

Top singer/model/actress and ero-novel writer Aya Sugimoto holds forth on the situation in this Q&A:

A: Something like this is just a matter of taste.

Deciding your boyfriend is abnormal based on something like this is just unfair to him.

Those kinds of incidents do make people look at SM fans like they are dangerous criminals, but to people engaged in SM play, it really is just “play,” and those incidents are on a completely different level. There are people who can’t make that distinction and call for BDSM games to be banned too, but that’s pure nonsense.

Enjoying unhealthy fantasies is what adults do.

Your boyfriend was just enjoying a simple fantasy, wasn’t he? The real issue is not his fantasies, but your paranoia about them!

He was just hiding his tastes from you to avoid causing any issues. What’d you think of a guy who introduced himself to you like this: “Hi, I’m into BDSM slave domination games!”?

Finding out each other’s lusts gradually through spending more and more nights together – that’s how an adult couple blossoms sexually, isn’t it?

There are of course lots of couples who never show their true selves to one another, but such relationships are incredibly shallow in the end.

Even if your tastes and his tastes don’t match, if you love your partner then you should make the effort to understand their tastes.

You might be a bit put out by his taste for SM, but there’s no shortage of women who are really into that sort of thing. However, society generally tells them a woman shouldn’t be seeking that kind of thing out.

In fact, having the innermost desires you didn’t even realise you had awakened is the greatest! You can come to understand one another and share a fantasy together.

With this, the junk sex you’re having just to satisfy your lust can advance to become truly psychologically fulfilling sex!

To conclude, there’s no need to repress yourself sexually just because you’re a woman – try making an effort to understand your man’s desires. If he’s kind to why on earth would you need to worry about him imprisoning you as a sex slave?

Of course, you should also tell him what you want. Spend some time at it, I’d love to see you develop a deeper and more intimate relationship together.

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Aya Sugimoto is not only reason personified, she also happens to be rather sexy herself, and distinctly unafraid to show it as the below gravure rather amply demonstrates:

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