Japanese women asked to rate the most unseemly and embarrassing conduct they felt a boyfriend could get up to provide a list which might lend some insight into just how best to avoid looking an utter fool in the eyes of the fairer sex.
1. He has bad table manners.
2. He gets angry at shop assistants who make mistakes.
3. He pretends to know things he doesn’t.
4. He brags about past evil deeds.
5. He tries to get you to kiss him when other people are around.
6. He dashes for empty seats on trains or buses.
7. He speaks in an accent other than his own. [i.e. uses Kansai-ben despite not being from Kansai]
8. He asks things like “Do you love me?” when other people are around.
9. He asks how much you think his clothes cost.
10. He blows his hair about.
Narrowly missing the top 10 were “doing his hair using his reflection in a window” and “unconsciously using old-fashioned language.”
The list for embarrassing girlfriends.
Not unreasonably, it seems good manners and civil behaviour are considered crucial by both genders…
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These seem to be truly more 'embarrassing' than the list for women. Those were more annoying and I find that couples that do most of these things in public are freaking annoying/embarrasing to bystanders...
I 2nd that.
It dawned on me a while ago that pretty much all of the '10 most something you boy/girlfriend can do' are all the same...
Why cant you just do a '10 most embarassing things your partner can do' ? -_-"
"9. He asks how much you think his clothes cost."
They forgot to add this to the female list.
That's usually because these lists are made for half trolling of the opposite gender and the list following that is just retaliation for the 1st list
Because eventually the issue of sex will be adressed which can invite the notion of dick girls and the like if specific genitals are mentioned.
Unconsciously using dead language?
So what... we can't complain or make a joke about something that's been done ad nauseum?
The polls go with ranking preselected items which explains their similarity
@Anon 15:08
I wonder if by "unconsciously using dead language" they meant, "archaic terms", or "slang/memes which have been beaten into the ground" (i.e., "LOL")?
Alas, then I shan't deign to use dead language.
They keep quiet about it since it's your money.
#5 He asks things like “Do you love me?” when my other boyfriends are around.
ok since when talking old fashion is embarrassing ?
Go to NYC and yell out "Dude, how's it hanging?!" to the first acquaintance you manage to see.
He's going to shit himself from embarrassment. Especially if he's in an official meeting or something like that.
Weird list. No farting, burping, nose picking and nut arranging? Do japanese girls like that? ^_^
No, the japanese men aren't doing that.
Now men and women think alike ?
the japanese are a genderless race.
Hideyoshi?
If only. ;.;
http://www.sankakucomplex.com/2009/08/06/skirts-high-fashion-amongst-japanese-men/
In japan the gender roles are pretty much reversed. The women are men and the men are women.
That is actually untrue, but it's funny to hear people say that.
3. He pretends to know things he doesn’t.
This is what happens when people are introduced to people they have nothing in common with...
Women do this too >_> Sadly women can mask it by talking crap about absolutely nothing relevant 26 hours a day, 20 days a week especially with other females.
The proper formulation would be
3. He pretends to know things he doesn't and fails to get away with it on a regular basis.
Which truly is embarrassing plenty
Also, where I'm from talking in a different dialect is actually used for comedic purposes? Is this somehow not applicable to the Japanese? Or do Japanese men tend to go overboard with this?
Lots of anime have seiyuus doing kansai-ben. There are few who can do it well. The ones who fail just end up sounding silly.
I guess the same applies to men who tries too hard to impress girls but fails. Just like some locals here who tries to mimic an Australian or American accent to sound cool after an overseas study trip.
'to sound cool' as a motive might more easily incite fail indeed... Rather than comedic purposes that is
But for such a thing to make it into a top 10 of embarrassing things boyfriends do O_o
Some kind of endemic? Or as stated below by Dash, a shortage of alternatives to vote on?
Unless we're dealing with a major pain in the a in some countries, I fail to see why it should rank so high
On a side note, it seems Dash believes (wo)men are worlds apart
I dont believe men and women must have different tastes for everything, but after seeing like 10 polls on this site that have almost exactly the same results for both.... kinda makes me wonder how they do these polls.
Depending on how long the trip takes it could simply by yourself unknowingly/unwillingly adapting. I for one usually spend most of the day quite far from where I live causing me to lose my normal accent.
It's simply something that automatically happens.
Same thing if you happen to talk a lot with someone that uses a certain phrase a lot.. before you know it you'll be using it yourself ;)
"Also, where I'm from talking in a different dialect is actually used for comedic purposes? Is this somehow not applicable to the Japanese? Or do Japanese men tend to go overboard with this?"
I guess it means that they do it seriously, like how wiggers try to talk like they're from the ghetto even though they're from the suburbs.
This is a good explanation.
I don't get why grown adults are fretting over table manners especially of those who aren't their children. This must be some sort of Japanese thing. Probably a product of their overly fastidious culture.
Actually, it's a top 10 of >embarrassing< things
Having a boyfriend/girlfriend along visiting friends/family and scarfing down food is really embarrassing as long as at least one party is raised properly or intends to portray the offending party as being civilized.
Answering phones at the table is a no no, walking off during dinner same thing... There's plenty to be embarrassed about I'd say.
Also dependent on context - meeting the folks versus fast food restaurant for example.
For Asians this is potential double trouble since they get both the chopstick eating style and engineered cutlery style, the first one (as far as I know and can tell from personal experience) generally being more messy/sloppy and the amount of etiquette that goes into properly eating with knife and forks can be quite...
A hassle... is as neutral a term as I can produce.
Especially when it comes to multiple courses and concomitant overkill: salad forks, butter knives, dessert spoons and whatever other instrument of organic matter manipulation you can think of.
X-mas and pretenti--- posh restaurant traumas resurfacing as I type -_-
TL;DR
Table manners are important to some, if not most
Nope, it's actually a world wide stupid issue and it's applied to any people. In some countries (mediterranean) is common to eat with your hands, in Asia that would be awful but they find common to burp after eating, in Europe that's disgusting... in other words, this people are just picky and basiclly annoying, as long I'm not eating YOUR food in YOUR house infront of YOU, I really think they are being plain dumb, in a restaurant you can simply look the other way and that does it, if you're with someone and he has terrible manners, well, it's HIS life and people won't judge you because of him... manners are just fancy arcaism.
That's naive, people do judge you based on the company you keep and a lack of manners shows a lack of consideration and respect to your dining companions.
Important table manners are a mixture of practicality, social grace and hygiene. Keeping your elbows off the table for example minimizes the chance you'll knock someone's plate or drink. If you follow basic common courtesy it means everyone at the table can eat in comfort and have an enjoyable meal.
It's okay to relax your etiquette when just with friends and family but ignoring basic ettiquette is a sure-fire way to not get invited out again.
I really don't know anyone who cares about keeping elbows off the table except parents who want to have something to hold over their children and unnecessarily criticize them.
Elbows off the table is just a consideration. If you knock someone's plate, you won't be happy.
How do elbows on the table cause you to knock over a plate? How close are other people sitting to you? Do they place their plates behind your elbows?
Do you even know where does "manners" come from?, come on, it's a victorian fancy way to set a false state of richnness, all that elbow thing and such are purely arbitrary conditions. Like some says, you're not 10 cm from the other person plate and other thing, don't confuse manners with hygene and CONSIDERATION, being respectful and considerate doesn't mean you'll have good manners. 5 different types of forks?, WTF is that, a fork is a DAMN FORK! MANNERS MY ASS!
Ever considered that the differences between utensils is derived from practicality? Try drinking soup with a tea spoon and you will quickly realize the use of a soup spoon.
Consideration is exactly what manners are, I wouldn't call what you are referring to as manners in any case but ritual some of which is important in it's own way. You are probably already following most of what is considered good table manners anyway. It's important to remember that table-manners are guidelines not rules except in formal places.
There's such thing as tea spoon?, Jesus, A SPOON FOR FRIGGIN TEA!?, now tell me that's isn't just stupid.
No, being considerate is having emphaty (sp?) towards people, manners give a crap for other people and instead makes you LOOK BETTER THAN OTHER PEOPLE at least that's supposed to how it works. Here's an example: Is it considered "mannered" to share your food to someone?, FUCK NO!, it's supposed to be mannered to share IF the other people asks for it but NEVER ask if he wants some. Consideration is exactly the opposite, it's asking the other person if he would like some of it. See the difference?
Ah, I expected there not to be a difference. Although I'm still surprised to see celphones off the list entirely.
I'm only guilty of moving around my hair every time I see a mirror or a reflection, but I am narcissist and just about every girl I've ever dated knows that.
Take it or leave it.
5. He tries to get you to kiss him when other people are around.
More like the other way around in my case, ugh
Other way around? Your boyfriend tries to kiss other people when you're around?
That's terrible!
or other people try to kiss her when her boyfriend is around
ok, why whenever there is a poll like this it seems they made a top 10 from a poll with only 14 options?
Seriously, all polls are almost the same except for 2 or 4 options, and changing numbers
"9. He asks how much you think his clothes cost."
Wut? Is that like some type of guessing game or something? I've never heard a man ask something like that.
“unconsciously using dead language.”
I don't understand how someone can use a dead language unconsciously. It's not like people start to randomly speak latin or some other old language without realizing it.
I'm surprised stuff like "farting in public" isn't on here.
It says old-fashioned language, not dead.
Thus thou art in error!
Or I'm guessing it's just words of the previous generation you picked up from your parents that you really shouldn't be using yourself. "I'm having a jolly good time!" or something along those lines..
1 3 6 and 10 are facts, the other 6...u kiddin' me, right?
what about "he is a lolicon"
Or being an otaku. Or is that an assumption/requirement that needs not be said?
Being an ataku AND having a girlfriend didn't passed the mind of the people who made the poll.
You can alternatively make your girlfriend a lolicon.
lesbians ftw