“Shotgun Weddings” Now “Angel Weddings”

angel-wedding

The most common reason for marriage in Japan now appears to be unplanned pregnancy, and the enterprising Japanese bridal industry, fearful of the effect the term “shotgun wedding” might be having on their sales, is planning on renaming marriages designed to cover up an unexpected pregnancy “angel weddings” instead…

The term used in Japanese to denote marriages based on an already conceived pregnancy is a “dekichatta kekkon”, abbreviated to “dekikon,” very roughly an “accidental marriage,” often one where the frequently woeful understanding of contraception many Japanese possess has failed completely.

This carries a very similar if not identical nuance to the English term “shotgun wedding,” a marriage bride and groom are obliged to undertake after a child is conceived out of wedlock, lest their families scorn or even disown them.

Estimates put the number of such weddings at as much as 40% of the total in Japan, possibly making it the single largest contributor to marriage rates, but in spite of this commonness the practice is still viewed very negatively by many Japanese.

However, Japan’s cunning bridal industry has already sensed an opportunity, and is now pushing for these “shotgun weddings” to instead become known as “angel weddings.” A variety of other similar terms are being pushed, with some of the more desperate being “mamaridge” and “double happy marriage”…

Via Itai News.

2ch provides a variety of its own suggested terms, most of which are thankfully untranslatable…

“No-rubber-sex-riage.”

“The bridal industry must really be desperate, it’s painful to behold…”

“Double happy? If it were a happy occurrence they wouldn’t have been using contraceptives in the first place…”

“We-couldn’t-wait-riage.”

“What do you mean, ‘their contraception has failed’? They probably weren’t even using any from the start…”

“Unplannedge.”

“It’s not really a ‘contraception mishap’ if they aren’t even on the pill and they come inside…”

“In this era let us be thankful they are getting married at all.”

“There’s loads of young ones today who just come inside to force a marriage on. At least their parents will be happy.”

“Slaveriage.”

“Changing the word like this is on the same level as saying ‘let’s find a cool way of saying virginity!’”

“Is-this-really-mine-riage.”

“’Angel marriage’ – what the hell? Just call it an improper accident!”

“My-life-is-overiage.”

“If the image is so bad then don’t do it…”

“I-couldn’t-get-rid-of-heriage.”

“I don’t understand why the image needs to be improved, or why it was bad to begin with…”

“Just changing the name doesn’t change the image.”


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    Comment by Leon4000
    12:31 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    It is crazy though. To my point of view, sex isn't something just to be done just like that unless people take some time to know each other and spend time together until their relationship is ready enough for them to do it at a special moment. Yet, people still do it even before their married, and maybe not enough to fully know themselves and their feelings toward each other. Some men do notice that they need to keep themselves from impregnated the woman their in love with, because they are not ready to have kids just yet, so they use condoms. However, the fact that some men and woman who just have unprotected sex without any condom before getting married just means that they are asking for it too early when they especially don't want it. But you know human nature when it comes to babies, once it starts, it won't stop until the baby is born. On the contrary, abortion are their to stop the process.

    Comment by Lvrhina
    12:24 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    welcome to alabama

    Avatar of sanimej2
    Comment by sanimej2
    12:40 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Welcome to the world known as the "Maury Povich Show".

    "you ARE the father!!!!"

    Comment by EyE
    12:50 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    this goes way back. when a woman get pregnant without being marry probably means she got rape. Naturally people disprove of the evil seed inside the stomach and therefore the saying "son of a bastard".

    Avatar of rollchan
    Comment by ajnac
    13:16 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    shotgun wedding?

    uzi wedding. hehehe...

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:26 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    That's like my life story right there. So fucking sad...

    Comment by Leon4000
    13:17 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    As "angelic" the marriage is, the question that comes to mind is that does the newlyweds have enough money to take care of themselves and the baby they're having since they conceived the child way before marriage. Because it can get difficult knowing that you've got to pay a bit MORE for the child. Buying diapers, food, and other baby stuff. These are important things to know. For some people, this is going to get very tiring.

    Comment by Leon4000
    13:40 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Sure, having sex without condoms feels more better than having to do it with condoms, since couples want their bodies to feel like they're connected without anything taking the pleasurable feeling away. But the more they screw each other during unprotected sex, the MORE likely a guy's million s***ms will shoot out from his d**k and into the woman v**na. And out of a million sperms, only the surviving sperm(s) can go into the number of egg(s) that has been released, ready for fertilization. It's that obvious. Condoms does reduce the risk of pregnancy happening as long as they're not cheap and won't break easily which does happen sometimes. So many young teens and adults who have not even graduated college yet, end up doing it and unintentionally asking for parenthood too quickly, then have to got through the decision of whether they want the baby or not.

    As much as anybody including myself repeats this so many times, we have to do it to remind others how serious and responsible it is to make and raise a baby and for them to have reasons not to having it yet. If anybody wants to say F**k it I'm having sex even though I'm not married yet, THEN WEAR CONDOMS. I may be just shoving it in people's faces, but some people just let their desires take over them, and not having them thinking about using condoms sometimes.

    Avatar of Shuu
    Comment by Shuu
    18:37 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Where I live, colleges and universities have special young parent support programs, which enable young girls to study even if they do already have a child at that age. This includes (but is not limited to) in-campus day care centers, at least one baby changing room in every building, special children's/baby meals in the canteens, etc. etc. - everything free of charge.
    The reasoning behind this is that the government tries to encourage everyone, no matter if married or not, to have children. In this day and age, you don't solve the problem of a rapidly declining population by holding on to outdated morals.

    Comment by Anonymous
    22:26 22/06/2011 # ! Neutral (0)

    Exactly, Japan needs all the babies and marriages that it can get.

    Comment by daz
    12:08 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    As much as I love 2D Japan, and in some cases live-action Japan (movies, dorama), real-life Japan is just plain sad. To see an entire nation buying into a sad lie is painful. The rest of the world has already realized that there is no such thing as an "accidental pregnancy"....you see long ago we figured out the causal relationship between unprotected sex and pregnancy so if you have unprotected sex, it's another way of saying "I want a child". It's no accident...the act of having unprotected step is a willful attempt at having a child.

    BTW, down here in Australia, these marriages are called what they are: "Child Support Revenue generators". Men worldwide would do well to simply get dressed and RUN when a (single) woman suggests or permits unprotected sex.....please visit your local slums, trailer parks or public schools for a good look at why. Bad parents (and yes not planning a pregnancy is the 1st sign of parental incompetence) == bad children (there are exceptions in a tiny minority of cases...care to bet your future and salary on an exception?).

    Comment by Anonymous
    16:36 21/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Oddly, men and women elsewhere have also figured this out. Turns out, in the western world, between 40 to 60% of the marriages are due to the woman getting pregnant--- whether she's done it "accidentally on purpose" or "accidentally accidentally on purpose" (she meant to "mess up", just not so "quickly"). So it's quite the purposeful wesern world tradion, to move a relationship along, or "just to get married".

    But I'm surprised no one mentioned the tradition where romantic couples often poke needles into the love-motels "complementary" condoms, to "help" the next romantic couple get over the hump and get married. Or as a joke on them, for being silly enough to use the provided house condoms.

    Avatar of Myballz
    Comment by Lazydabear
    12:07 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Words have a effect that most Japanese tend to believe or not enjoy hearing sometimes.

    Comment by Eamon
    11:31 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Very common around the world

    Avatar of tingle
    Comment by tingle
    11:21 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    If it weren't for Bastards we wouldn't have people like me, Clarence Thomas, and Barack Obama. The difference? In America when the guy finds out wyour pregnant he asks "By Whom?" and then runs very very fast.

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:34 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    I thought that only happens in Alabama?

    Comment by Anonymous
    16:25 21/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    You can't run from family.

    Avatar of Boozedimpulsegundam
    Comment by boozedimpulsegundam
    11:10 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    or,should-have-tried-harder-to-convince-her-to-try-anal-riage

    Avatar of Atma
    Comment by Atma
    11:31 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    You do know pulling out and anal can and will result in pregnancies as well, right? Anal can leak spillage into the vagina and precum can get a girl pregnant as well, so pulling out is no better than praying for it.

    Enjoy your future accidental pregnancies.

    Comment by Waterfall Towers
    12:16 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    I wish I knew someone like you in real life :P

    Avatar of Boozedimpulsegundam
    Comment by boozedimpulsegundam
    12:22 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    hahahaha, a new contender steps in the ring! :-D

    Avatar of Boozedimpulsegundam
    Comment by boozedimpulsegundam
    11:37 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    well it was supposed to be funny and it seems your sense of humor is as atrophied as your penis. Besides I can fire off higher then her stomach.

    Avatar of Atma
    Comment by Atma
    11:40 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    I was making jokes as well, but if you seriously think those prevent pregnancies, you're in for a hell of a wake up call.

    And I'm a girl. Try harder.

    Avatar of Boozedimpulsegundam
    Comment by boozedimpulsegundam
    11:45 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    well I have a long term girlfriend and we are planning on getting married and then having kids. so this isn't going to work out, so no tears ok?

    Comment by Anonymous
    16:24 21/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Still less likely--- especially anal. In fact, that's what Kobe got in trouble for. She was all happy for the vaginal, but Kobe, like most NBA stars (and advised by their team staff), swapped targets to finish anally. THAT'S when she stopped consenting--- but he didn't stop until he was finished.

    To to girls going to bang an NBA player--- he WILL slam that back door of yours, just so you won't get a "baby lottery". Be prepared.

    Anon has spoken.

    Comment by the other anon
    14:12 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    What? No "immaculate conception" when that was one of the most famous examples in history?

    Comment by Anonymous
    14:49 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Ummmm...japanese people can be retarded sometimes...ever heard of ABORTIONS!?!

    Abortion is essentially 100% birthcontrol, sex without condoms, without the worry of raising a child....

    Seriously, ever thought of giving ABORTION a chance?

    Comment by Anonymous
    17:33 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    I don't know if you are trolling or just being ignorant...Abortion isn't exactly a walk in the park. It carries chances of having SERIOUS complications and even death. Anyone who has the slightest regard for human life would take this decision very gravely. Get back to real world, kid.

    Avatar of Atma
    Comment by Atma
    19:19 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Only if you get a shitty, back alley style abortion. Most professional ones are quite safe.

    Comment by Anonymous
    17:46 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Nor is giving birth. Lot of women every year die due to complications. According statistics driving a car is more dangerous than having abortion in industrial countries.

    Comment by Fonzer
    18:28 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    not shure but i don't think they allow abortions there anymore.
    Well they probably do but it costs them money.

    Comment by hALOTOO
    12:14 20/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Glad to see that they are not running away from their problem

    Comment by Anonymous
    04:54 20/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    marriage is stupid unless you're smart and in for money

    Avatar of maxchain
    Comment by maxchain
    16:29 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Woeful understanding of contraception? You mean, that "it's not a Safe Day but I'll will myself into not being fertilized" bit you see in so many doujins doesn't actually work out conveniently in real life?!

    Avatar of Domo-Kun
    Comment by Domo-Kun
    15:27 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    You can see from the translated comments that most Japanese people think that pulling out is an effective method.

    Since Japanese women think that pulling out is effective, that's how so many Japanese guys can do naka dashi and say it was an accident.

    Smart...

    Avatar of misterchef
    Comment by Riot Gear
    18:22 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    are they following a Leah-Dizon-trend nowadays?

    Avatar of ahbonk
    Comment by ahbonk
    18:00 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Oh noes, it's the reverse time lag!

    Kafuka's concepts always win

    Comment by Anonymous
    17:47 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    I'd marry the one in the op picture immediately

    Avatar of Boozedimpulsegundam
    Comment by boozedimpulsegundam
    11:08 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    or, Why-didn't-I-just-make-her-swallow-iage

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:07 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Why-weren't-you-on-the-pillridge?

    Avatar of Jenny
    Comment by Ryoko
    07:46 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Yes, and fish are now "Sea Kittens" too.

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:41 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    >>fish
    >>sea kittens
    Umi neko
    Seagulls
    When the seagulls cry

    \(o_o)/ lolwut

    Avatar of brek_kreb
    Comment by black87
    07:26 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    “No-rubber-sex-ridge.”

    :D

    Comment by EyE
    08:08 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    sad just sad. I can see Japan ending with this problem

    Comment by —-
    08:15 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    More abortions = More angels in heaven.

    (With apologies to SomethingAwful)

    Comment by Leon4000
    07:18 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    I've seen this before, it happens sometimes. It doesn't even bother me at all. Sometimes couples just can't wait till after marriage to have sex. It's their decision after all. Although they may have thought to take condoms before that, but never did because it would not be a big deal but it is. Anyway, this kind of news isn't that much anyway, it just happens regardless of where it happens in the world.

    Comment by Anonymous
    07:26 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    what a liberally minded person! and with such worldly experience!

    Comment by SCB
    11:49 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    You're an idiot, Anonymous.

    Comment by SnooSnoo
    08:39 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Return to the Jesus era please

    Comment by Firo
    06:35 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Once again, 2ch wins the internets. (´∀`)

    And yes, as one 2ch'er pointed out, "just changing the name doesn’t change the image"...

    Comment by bolt
    10:23 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    people are sheep.... they'll belive anything...... .... .... Hope and change!!!!!

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:21 19/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    sometimes it does. it wont work on some - but it'll fool enough im guessing.





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