SOM: Eroge Dutch Wife Interface, Works with Cross Days
- Author: Artefact
- Categories: Games, H, News
- Date: Dec 7, 2008 00:49 JST
- Tags: Cross Days, Dutch Wife, Gadgets, Marketing, Onanism, SOM
Devoted onanists are greeting the latest innovation in Dutch wife technology with glee; the device, dubbed SOM, promises computer controlled mechanical stimulation synchronised with the events of eroge via a USB interface.
The first game to support it is none other than esteemed bug developer Overflow’s latest QC crisis: Cross Days.
The device, available in four versions, “Men’s”, “Lady’s” and the dread “Hand”, along with “Puchi”, or “Petit” SOM, promises the “Next Generation in Sensory Reality” via its innovative “Sync-Climax” system.
And in action:
It will apparently alter its mechanical stimulation according to the tempo of the scene currently being experienced in the eroge (currently only Cross Days); it looks as if compatibility with normal AV and similar is also possible.
The company has this to say about their product (the original Engrish):
“SOM is our company’s original, high spec machine. You should experience its real satisfaction has never existed. It is possible to use with domestic power supply (100V). For long term use, make materials under the complete manners. If you have any trouble, we will guarantee the maintenance for free. We are sure of the super-satisfaction much more than it’s price.”
Some digging reveals why they are not so sure about the price: it is ¥45,000 (or ¥25,000 for the Puchi SOM) – clearly a technological marvel such as this must involve colossal development costs which need to be recouped, or perhaps the maker is merely playing gadget-crazed and sex-starved otaku for fools, we can but speculate.
In addition to the SOM and Cross Days, a “SOMCON” controller unit is also required…
Visit their homepage, available in Engrish, for more details; see also the Cross Days SOM page. Via Itai News.
The future of onanism technology, or a cunning rube bilking gimmick? Would you integrate such a device into your eroge sessions?
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OMG x_x they've done it...
I wonder if there will be differents type of and according to the differents girls
MIKURU BEAMMMM!
WAHAHA NO HA
Japan, helping otaku reach new lows 365 days a year.
Agreed. Now I finally understand the concept of "race to the bottom."
Oh otaku culture ... every time I think you've hit rock bottom, some hands you a mechanical hand job.
... mm. i couldnt agree more -.-
What's low about it...
Wut.
Words cannot express the incomprehension I am feeling now
OH U JAPAN~
you never cease to amaze me XDDD
nice fleshlight~
Correction, fleshlight on STERIODS!!! (lets just hope it doesnt go robo-roid rage on us XD)
face palm.jpg
Jesus christ.
would really love to have one of those
Hmm I'd be the first to comtemplate trying them out, after all, it's all heading towards Videodrome.
I'm intrigued by the unizex function, wait, does this mean I can experience getting reaped by dickgirls!?!?!? :D
You not the only one lol. Curiosity only gets me in trouble...
hahahahaha, this seriously made my day, thanks artefact
As usual you're late with the news...
Yet another time traveler I see.
Wat you're sayin there? I can't hear anything when you're under that rock. [http://blue.tennokoe.net]
Let me direct you to the right post, exactly. [http://blue.tennokoe.net/?p=42]
The only thing under a rock is that post you dug out.
Well, that's really a fansubber's blog, with a very narrow audience.
WOW SO HE POSTED IT FIRST!
Too bad it was the only thing about such things... I don't see any reap stories.
Still, nice attempt at promoting another website.
Come on, should you still be surprised by now? SC steals more than half of it's articles, so of course it can't be fast on the money.
A banhammer must repent these heathens
Given the murderous repuation of Overflow's games, a USB kitchen knife that stabs the player repeatedly might be more appropriate. Maybe that's a hidden surprise feature in one of those things.
Hidden razors in the device to pop out when least expected.
exactly... it's just like the story about the guy who was taken to hospital with severe lacerations to his penis. he complain his wife "had a rat in her pussy". turns out that a surgical needle was left inside of her during her recent hysterectomy...
i would have thought most guys would have stopped after the first "bite"...
SCIENCE!
Japan isn't actually ahead of the curve on this one. The US came up with a pressure-sensitive USB gadget for a fleshlight that fits with the appropriate hydraulics function in one of the few 3D beast-with-two-backs simulators. That is to say, the program responds to thrusting sensed by the USB device.
Now granted, the interaction is in the other direction -- but come on, this is _so_ in the same category.
Japan, producing the 78% of the world's weirdest shit since 1952.
And that weird shit is what keeps you coming to this site! :D
Eh, call me when it's compatible with 3D Custom Girl.
And there still seems to be no cure for cancer or world hunger, not to mention AIDS.
Sex trumps all those things, so that is no surprise.
Everyone uses these; AIDS is cured.
they should get the honorary Darwin award: for removing so many out of the gene pool
that aside, sounds like an interesting concept...and before anyone rebukes it, sure it looks messed up but consider it in 20-30 years when they make complete androids....betcha lots of ppl wont be saying ewww then
I agree completely. Just look at the various ero-dolls and imagine them moving on their own accord - the old fashioned sex trade is going to go out of business.
Damn, holy crap, I think I'm gonna be sick............
-_-
Just.....ugh.......
Sick? lol. And wheh your old (assuming your not) and people say ick to you, you will have a new best friend lol!
Those it come in a loli structure and feeling XD
Just another toys for to cater the adults
Just make sure yours isn't second hand, would cause an outcry
I hope it's Web 2.0 Compatible. I can imagine this kind of technology now: A porn site uses remote control toys via the internet and synchronizes with paying members. Oh what fun!
Wait, paying for porn?
...
ahhahahahaa
I think I'll stick to my god hand thanks lol
It would be fun to see if someone's gonna get their dicks ripped off by one of these when Cross Days bugged out and sends repeat acceleration commands to the machine...
http://tech3d.sakura.ne.jp/future/future.html
Now it works with 3D Custom Girl. There's a video with a cucumber. wwwwww
Dirty minded Fapanese people.
so, uh, what?! its sounds like they'll charge you more than it's worth, you'll get non existant satisfaction and if you don't they come round and get you off for free. did i read that statement right? i'm afraid my engrish isn't up to scratch...
Next in the news, we'll hear about a penis being cut off and put on one of those as replacement.