Police launched a major murder investigation after a corpse was sighted in the mountains, sending 15 police to the scene and mobilising a crack team of 30 investigators. The corpse turned out to be a forlorn Dutch wife (love doll), dumped in the mountains after outliving its usefulness.
The case begins in rural Shizuoka, where the calm of a mountainside given over to holiday villas was shattered by an unprecedented report.
A lady (59), whilst walking her dog one morning, had spotted some five metres off the path a human shape wrapped in plastic, amongst the trees. The lady promptly reported the discovery to police, telling them she had seen a wrapped up body.
Police immediately dispatched 15 investigators to the scene. The would-be corpse was found to be 170cm in length, apparently bound up into the bag, with all that was visible a head of hair. The bundle felt soft and fleshy to the touch.
Investigators concluded they were dealing with a female murder victim, requested autopsy proceedings, and cordoned off the area as a crime scene.
As soon as word got back to head office, section one of the homicide squad was mobilised, sending out 30 officers to the scene to commence investigations proper. A journalist who had been covering the local disaster prevention day at the station caught wind of it, and soon the local evening paper was carrying the shocking news.
Soon the police were ready to remove the body, some four hours after the morning report; they went to open the bag and remove the corpse.
In a moment the tension was shattered as it was immediately apparent that the “body” was an elaborately made Dutch wife. Looking carefully at the bag, it was found to be specially made for transporting the doll.
Police chiefs had this to say about the affair: “It was unnatural for there to be no odour at the scene, but this murder case, we could not just open the bag lightly. It was all too real.”
Police did however find marks of “violence” on the unfortunate doll, thus they concluded the doll lived out its usefulness in a harsh manner, with the unknown perpetrator likely “dumping it in the mountains after becoming embarrassed, in a selfish crime.”
We do not hear what became of the unfortunate doll after the investigation.
Via ZakZak. You can read what happened next here.
Lest you think it entirely unreasonable for them to make this comical mistake, in all probability the doll in question was a work of onanistic artistry (the price of which is many thousands of dollars), like the following:
It must be a great trouble to dispose of such a thing discretely.
There’s a novel called Wilt that used this idea.
Why would someone throw away such a masterpiece?
:/
“It was unnatural for there to be no odour at the scene, but this murder case, we could not just open the bag lightly. It was all too real.”
Viral marketing gone horribly right? XD
A couple of grand, ever heard of a prostitute? Granted the prostitute may have STDs
Now Feminists have a reason to try and protect the rights of a Dutch Wife much like how they want to protect the rights of imaginary character. o_O
OMG don’t give them ideas