Man Saws Off Own Penis: “This Happens All The Time”


A carpenter who accidentally sawed off his own penis is apparently embarrassed by the hideous accident, which according to his mother “happens all the time” to the people in his profession.

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  • Anonymous commented on December 5, 2010 21:27

    'Tis but a flesh wound... More

  • BloodThirstyNogitsune commented on April 18, 2010 11:21

    that picture is scary... More

Lolicon Head Teacher Smears Cream On Schoolgirls


A top head teacher and inspector of schools has been found guilty of sexually inspecting at least five schoolgirls, though he insists it is all a misunderstanding and he was merely “applying medicinal cream” to their genitals, or “taking them to the toilet.”

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  • Anonymous commented on February 11, 2010 21:22

    I bet ur a fucking 13 year old hu still wets d bed.. FUUUCCKKK YOOOOUUUUU!!!... More

  • Anonymous commented on November 2, 2009 05:27

    hot... More

Female Equality in Violent Crime Looms


Crime statistics and prison populations are usually dominated by male offenders, but UK statistics show one quarter of violent attacks reported in last year were instigated by women, a figure which has been precipitously rising in recent years and threatens unwanted female equality in violent criminality.

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  • onitake commented on June 2, 2009 20:09

    you reap what you sow! when they reach 50/50, will we have equal salaries, maternity leave for both m&f, men carrying around babies in their bellies, mutual sexual harassment at the workplace, militia duty regardless of... More

  • King of Hentai Gods commented on June 1, 2009 08:48

    We all know there are more Bitches (2/3 females) than Bastards (1/3 males) =P... More

Father Arrested for Buying Prostitute for Virgin Son


A father who attempted to procure a prostitute to take his 14-year-old son’s virginity had the singular misfortune to proposition an undercover police woman, who promptly arrested him for attempting to have his son have sex with a harlot.

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  • Anonymous commented on June 25, 2014 10:20

    Just imagine what the police woman was dressed like. Interesting.. maybe I should become a policeman.... More

  • Anonymous commented on November 27, 2013 02:10

    he didn't go to jail. suspended sentence... More

Square Enix Buys Tomb Raider


Square Enix recently hastily completed its purchase of UK game publisher Eidos, best known for its early oppai physics experiment Tomb Raider and its cosplay simulator Hitman, spending some £85 million on the company.

The Eidos group filed losses of £100 million in 2008 (due, they say, to restructuring), and as the below graphs show, has experienced plummeting or stagnant sales of its top franchises in recent years, leading some to wonder whether this deal was well advised?

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  • Anonymous commented on December 23, 2010 20:00

    Only liked TR:1 .... only if I could get a freaking... Remake of all the games within a single game all with current gen graphics, will I even think about spending another dime on this franchise. Its not... More

  • Anonymous commented on October 26, 2010 00:23

    i bought it from ps3 store, and lara croft its awesome, probably the most fun game in the series.... More

Stem Cell Breast Enlargement Dooms Flatness


Stem cell therapy now offers the prospect of “naturally” enlarged breasts, free of surgical implants.

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  • Anonymous commented on January 20, 2010 11:19

    To quote Peter Griffin in the episode of Family Guy, McStroke in which he gets stem cells injected into himself: "Why aren't we funding this?"... More

  • Ponky14 commented on August 12, 2009 09:14

    lets thank the japanese for this... More

The Most Depraved Street in Britain


A recent photo series has come to light which highlights the notorious street scene of  St. Mary Street in Wales. Taken in the years between 2005 and 2008, the series aims to capture the Welsh at their finest.

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  • Anonymous commented on June 30, 2012 03:39

    That guy eating right next to the one pissing...... More

  • Dude commented on November 3, 2011 13:40

    Cripes. Britain's equivalent of jersey shore.... More

Loli Manga: “We Need to Ban These Images”


The National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children (NSPCC) has joined such luminaries as UNICEF in coming out firmly in favour of the rights of imaginary children, lending its full support to the UK’s new draft legislation, set to ensure any illustrations of humans under the age of 18 a court deems erotic are rendered highly illegal, with anime and manga and their ambiguously aged characters likely to fair badly under the law.

The NSPCC’s Zoe Hilton has this to say on the subject:

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  • Anonymous commented on July 4, 2011 08:13

    I think all of this "virtuak child rights" is all bull...instead of being worried about some fictional character they should put a real effort in actually helping REAL flesh and blood children; there are hundreds... More

  • Anonymous commented on February 20, 2011 17:29

    No doubt that the MPs etc will go on an all expences paid trip to find out the facts?... More

Wii Kills Man


A man has died after a Wii Fit session went terribly awry; during his jogging session on the game, he collapsed and promptly died.

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  • darknetwork commented on June 21, 2010 20:27

    poor wii. accused for death... More

  • TheLAG commented on June 19, 2010 18:14

    Fine, here's a correction: British Diet: Meat, boiled vegetables, bread. As bland as possible. And Curry.... More

Obese Family “Too Fat To Work”, Demands More Benefits


A family which is so obese that they cannot work has convinced the government to pay them the equivalent of a substantial salary in benefits; not satisfied, they demand even more, saying “We deserve more”, and claiming that “All that healthy food is too expensive.”

The Chawner family claims £22,500 ($33,000, or $45,000 prior to the UK’s recent economic collapse) annually in benefits, having lived off state handouts without working for 11 years.

Still, even this is not enough and they demand more:

“What we get barely covers the bills and puts food on the table. It’s not our fault we can’t work. We deserve more.”

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  • Anonymous commented on June 24, 2011 21:07

    96? More like 50-70: More

  • Fyl commented on March 4, 2011 16:25

    3000 kcals? WTF? I'm 189 cm 72 kg and I usually eat around 4000 kcals. Used to weigh more, but that was when I ate about 5000-6000 kcals. These whales probably eat like 10k kcals... More

Taxi Driver Violates 500


A taxi driver whose 12 year career saw him drug and violent hundreds of women has finally been arrested, after police repeatedly botched investigations, so allowing him an extra year’s reign of terror.

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  • Anonymous commented on March 16, 2009 08:23

    He drugged each and every one with a sedative that makes memory fuzzy and therefore unreliable in a court of law. More than likely there WERE women that went directly to the police but... More

  • Anonymous commented on March 16, 2009 08:17

    Once again your RAPE-LOGIC is impeccable, MikeeUSA!!!... More

UK Bans Loli: “All Children are Victims”


The UK’s decline under illiberal socialist governance continues with the news that the UK is set to ban all drawn imagery of an erotic nature where the “impression” is that a participant or onlooker is a child, or rather is “under 18”.

The ban officially brands such imagery “disgusting”.

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  • Anonymous commented on February 10, 2017 00:29

    I don't care for lolicon. I do, however, care for principles, esp. where freedom of expression is concerned, as well as matters where common sense in the law is clearly defied. Because it... More

  • Anonymous commented on February 10, 2017 00:26

    As if a 9-year-old's really "consenting" to marriage or sex. But whatever. Folks will defend anything in the name of "faith." Well, to be fair, folks do the same with "science," too.... More

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