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The endless scope for disappointment, despair and disgust on entering the room of a promising conquest for the first time is yet again the subject of much discussion.

The most depressing things to encounter in the room of a member of the opposite sex:

They have piles of garbage bags…

Did they miss collection day, or is throwing this stuff away too much of a hassle? They smell and attract bugs, so it’s best to get rid of them – a consideration not just limited to the opposite sex.

There is hair all over their carpet and floor…

You soon end up wondering if they clean up at all when you see this. And especially if someone of the opposite sex is coming over, it’s all the more noticeable. Hair comes off easily by just rubbing the carpet whilst wearing rubber gloves, so do try to get rid of it.

They have bug traps and pesticides out…

You can be forgiven for wondering if they have a vermin problem if you see these. They are certainly proof of an unsanitary environment.

They have a stockpile of instant foodstuffs.

Even if they are for emergencies, having instant food piled up in the room is a major mood killer. Whether they are taking care of their health or have any money are also obvious from this, so at least put them away somewhere.

There is something missing you can’t quite see…

Blocked drains, wet patches, no sign of a gift you gave them, pictures of the two of you, etc – if there is no sign of your even knowing this person in their room it can be depressing.

As usual this rather polite list is prompting some concern amongst those least likely to have trouble with the opposite sex in their rooms:

“Religious literature is the worst…”

“Even if you are the same sex that is pretty shocking to see.”

“Actually the whole list is pretty shocking even if you are the same sex!”

“Onaholes…”

“Tissues…”

“Figures…”

“Pubic hair.”

“Dakimakura.”

“Nendoroids.”

“A full tower PC.”

“Loli ero-manga.”

“A desktop PC with lots of external HDD…”

“Car tyres or wheels, surely.”

“My wife!”

“Damn you – what’s wrong with having a stock of instant ramen!”

“Bottles of urine, collections of nail clippings, skin and bodily hair – I have actually encountered all these. But the worst was a collection of stuffed small animals.”

“Why do Tenga have to be so flashy?”

“They are supposed to be ornamental, right?”

“A really cute girl is coming to my room tonight. I have none of the stuff mentioned here, but what should I prepare? We’re both single students…”

“Pictures of your mother.”

“A guitar.”

“Me.”

“Tea and cakes.”

“Going to a guy’s place and having him bring out cakes for you seems wrong. Try takoyaki instead?”

“A video camera?”

“The Game of Life.”

“That is a good one…”

“A serious one – go to a cinema and get their movie leaflets, then leave them out somewhere visible. If she notices them, you can turn it into a date at the movies.”

“Somebody called me out on the roach poison one once…”

“Since when does anyone of the opposite sex come to our rooms!?”


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    196 Comments
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    Comment by Anonymous
    02:59 12/03/2013 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    Full tower PC ✔
    Figures ✔
    Nendoroids ✔
    Tons of external HDD ✔

    Almost there :)

    Comment by Anonymous
    04:21 12/03/2013 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    Bottles of urine ✔

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:47 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    frozen horsemeat ✔

    Avatar of kintama00
    Comment by kintama00
    03:18 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    no video camera :?

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:23 13/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    It is hidden, thus isn't supposed to be shown on the list.

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:46 14/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    hidden... in the 3-way tower speakers.

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:31 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    mascara ✔
    lip gloss ✔
    nail polish ✔

    I'm a guy btw...

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:19 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Condoms lying out in the open ✔
    Used Condoms lying out in the open ✔
    Laundry piles on the floor ✔
    Piles of shoes ✔
    Clutter on every surface ✔
    No cleaning chemicals in the house ✔
    Black/green entity growing in dirty fridge ✔
    Booze bottles everywhere ✔
    Chuck bucket with sick still in it ✔

    I'm a guy, and these are sighs you should run...

    Avatar of Siveria
    Comment by Siveria
    18:19 12/03/2013 # ! Quality (+0.8)

    Dude.. Hire a maid or something because thats just.. wrong.

    Comment by Anonymous
    09:34 13/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    Corpses ✔

    Avatar of Mauvais
    Comment by Mauvais
    18:47 13/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    Dear God. Are you sure that was a human female? With everything else described, I wonder how she lured males into using said condoms.

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:15 13/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    Wasn't my place, it was hers. Needless to say I didn't see her again.

    Comment by Anonymous

    well... good for you... creep

    Comment by Anonymous
    22:02 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    believes he has allready build up respect.

    Comment by Anonymous
    22:01 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    acting to get the creeperatus

    Comment by Anonymous
    22:01 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    for free.

    Comment by Anonymous
    04:18 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    They forgot:
    -Big 3-way speakers and an amplifier (✔)
    -A bunch of stuffed toolboxes (✔)

    Comment by Anonymous
    03:22 12/03/2013 # ! Drivel (-1.0)

    ALREADY THERE LOSER!

    Avatar of Imyou
    Comment by Imyou
    05:19 12/03/2013 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    I never see the real worst things to find on these lists...

    - Their ex
    - Their ex's corpse
    - Your own corpse(?!!)
    - WMDs
    - Xenomorphs
    - Shintaro Ishihara posters

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:59 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Ishihara poster is the only one that belongs on that list, the rest aren't that bad.

    Comment by Anonymous
    02:01 17/04/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    speaking of ishihara, is he like Taro Aso, clueless treasurer that is sending Japan down the Goldman sachs/drain.

    is he even popular or a governor for that matter?

    Comment by Dark Mage
    05:53 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    A duffel bag filled with severed heads.

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:42 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    I prefer a suitcase with lolis.

    Comment by Anonymous
    07:43 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    i just giggled xD

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:19 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    >keeping your ex's corps in the bead room and not in the basement where it belongs.

    fucking animals

    Comment by Anonymous
    05:50 13/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    Depends - if you have a freezer in your room why bother carrying it up and down the stairs all the time?

    Avatar of SlashTheCupcake
    Comment by SlashTheCupcake
    16:58 16/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Well if its down in the basement how are you going to draw funny pictures on their face? Basements are dark and smell weird (unless its a man-cave).

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:13 14/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    What do you mean "all the time?" what on earth could you be doing whit the corpse that requires hoisting it to the bed.... ooooohhh

    Avatar of warjoke
    Comment by warjoke
    10:29 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    I lol'd at the Ishihara poster.

    Comment by Anonymous
    02:17 12/03/2013 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    A full tower PC

    So now is forbidden to have a decent PC? sorry but i'm not in to laptops.

    Comment by Anonymous
    02:24 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    A Laptop can be decent... If you're not looking for decent operating power.

    Avatar of Onanymouse
    Comment by Onanymouse
    04:30 12/03/2013 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    Laptops are almost obsolete by now. A powerful desktop PC for gaming and serious work and a good tablet for everything else is perfectly reasonable.

    You don't have to make the PC seem like it's the main focus of your room... and even that should be fine as long as the room's tidy and clean and reasonably appealing.

    That comment in question was meant to be overly cynical anyway.

    Avatar of Onanymouse
    Comment by Onanymouse
    05:43 12/03/2013 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    04:45 I'm through with "gaming laptops". They superheat during summer. The GPU burns out after 2 years on average. Upgrading next to impossible. No thanks.

    Comment by Anonymous
    04:54 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    Well there's gaming and 'gaming'
    Anyway don't forget to freeze your sperm, the powerfull ones generate shitloat of heat...

    Unless you keep it on your desktop, but that would be pointless.

    Comment by Anonymous
    17:01 14/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    @ 22:37 Why would you do that on a laptop? Either you're on the road and heavy-duty work like encoding will kill the battery within 2 hours or you're inside, near a power socket and your laptop actually on top of a desk which kinda defeats the purpose doesn't it?

    Comment by Anonymous
    22:37 13/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    Actually, Laptops are great for people who need the horse power. If you do video encoding or software development, a tablet just isn't powerful enough.

    Comment by Anonymous
    03:18 13/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    >gaming laptop

    Comment by Anonymous
    04:45 22/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    14:01 you're full of shit. Drive that rig at full CPU and GPU load and the battery will be sucked dry after 2 hours at most. If you dispute this, you're lying, plain and simple.

    Comment by Anonymous
    14:01 19/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    U must have old laptop battery. this is year 2013. not 2004, The wireless internet IBM era. Buy the way I used to have one of those back in the day. then while I was a senior in high school I bought an HD Gateway Laptop with 14.7 inch 1000usd retail bestbuy. The dual core Ibm was 3000usd retail. Now I run a top of the line Fully 1080P 16.9 Aspect Ratio 17.3in HD LCD/LED Tru Cinematic View, 2x2 TB HDD, 16GB 204pin 1333Mhz ram, 4x Processors with 2.5ghz min & 3.1Ghz. Max turbo boost. 2x2 GB video graphics mini & the 2x2 is the set a side amount. The blue Ray Upgrade Was Use Less Do To My Downloading Everything at top speed. 1000usd after max out I bought ever bit of it on ebay & I used all the extra parts to upgrade other peoples older laptops. So I made got a return. so I only paid like a little over 700usd. I like nendoroids! There cute. LOL

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:38 19/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    have you ever heard of a solar powered generator. it is the year 2013 there like 100 dollars at the home depo and there small now, very portible.

    Comment by Anonymous
    04:47 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    A laptop is a must for graduate school.

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:24 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    Razer Blade =D! Is a laptop

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:01 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    what i got you got to get it put it in you
    what i got you got to get it put it in you
    what i got you got to get it put it in you
    feeling with thedealing don't stop continue

    Comment by Anonymous
    04:45 12/03/2013 # ! Drivel (-0.8)

    I disagree.
    Currently typing this from my gaming laptop, comes equipped with all the hardware one could possibly need for media, music and gaming and I can take it with me wherever an whenever I want. Only thing lacking is a decent set of speakers but even with a desktop you buy those separately.

    And in terms of software... well, we all have our friendly neighbourhood pirate for that.

    Comment by Anonymous
    02:46 12/03/2013 # ! Good (+0.6)

    Or a decent price.

    Comment by Anonymous
    06:18 12/03/2013 # ! Good (+0.6)

    Or any kind of longevity.

    Comment by Anonymous

    Or decent graphics.

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:20 14/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    thats a joke right? no laptop can even dream of being on the same league as my i7, 16gigs of ram, 4TB of hddd and dual 680s, not to mention 42 inch 3d monitor, and 500watts thx 5.1 home theatre, and yes i have that in MY room and most girls i bring there love it just as much as i do (maybe because of the endless playlist of chickflicks and ero flicks i kept in a folder just for them, twilight may suck but men it does the job to get theyr engines running)

    BTW i only have about 1TB of assorted anime/hentai at all times when i go over that i back it up to BDRs

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:30 19/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    Mine laptop can. I am from a long line of builders so. I take old laptops like Toshiba & modernize them. I believe the Japanese do the same thing. I am a dark skin white with Italian, German & Dutch future's so my heritage goes way back in the profession of paving the way for the future. The colonial style houses you see while on your road trips with your parents? My family can build those. Though there are not to many people now a days who can afford such a house. They were like small mansions. My grandmother live in one. It has a U-shaped drive way & you have to press the call button to get through. Burglars beware my grandmother owns antique artillery & will use it. Not to mention my families doll making heritage. Why can't I own dolls & plushy's & nendoroids. So screw people that hate my dolls.

    Comment by Anonymous
    17:44 18/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    I like nendoroids & large size anime dolls. Desktops suck when you run a business. Though if you use professional gaming PC's like I do you would not care about problems. Of coarse I own a hell of a gaming laptop. 2x2TB HDD's, 2 video graphics memory slots for removable mini video graphics chips 2x2gb of set aside graphics memory, 16GB 1333 ddr3 ram. Full HD 1080, 16:9 aspect ratio. min of 2.5 & max of 3.1 ghz when turbo boosting. Though never needs more then 2.8, 2 Military standard Wi Fi Mini adapter's with extended range pick wi fi at any store in the plaza or parking lot as long a one store is streaming. Page buffering? hell no! Fast start up & no buffering required. Load movie's & downloads fast & easy. only paid less then 1000.00 using ebay to buy brand name parts. I down load every thing. so my internal blue ray player upgrade is useless & obsolete. stacks of HD sandisk memory cards in cases. I do not think she will find my stash of hentai under the bed. it is in the form of mini chips. She says she like my laptop & she is a rave girl so she does not mind the LSD & Cocaine & Morphine on the desk next to a human sized Hatsune Miku Sex Doll.

    Comment by Anonymous

    Even laptop is too nerd for these judgmental twats. You need an iPad to please them.

    Comment by Dark Mage
    10:21 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Try to do serious work on an ipad?
    Shudder.

    Comment by Anonymous
    01:54 17/04/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    the cult of apple is also a personality cult.
    anyway Apple are rotten and Jobs is dead so why use I tunes which require an FOI inquest to view the library of itunes

    can you spell F-A-C-I-S-I-S-M

    Comment by Anonymous
    02:54 13/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    FULL TOWER PC WITH 12 TERA BYTES OF ANIME..LOL

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:04 13/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    That guy couldn't afford one. Simple.
    Anyway this list reeks of insecurity.

    I'll have whatever books I like in my room, be it religious or ero.
    I'll have a tissue box in case of emergency, such as when I spill my drink on my desk while using my tower PC.

    If a girl dislikes my figures, then she is out.

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:28 14/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    Yeah, your "drink" we ALL believe you

    Comment by Anonymous
    01:56 17/04/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    what happened to individualism and creativity, has the last generation thrown it down the public memory hole.

    Comment by Anonymous
    06:09 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    It's different in Japan than in the West, full tower PC over there where PC gaming isn't popular makes you look like an otaku.

    Comment by Anonymous
    17:54 18/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    I do not know what you are taking about?! Hentai movies? U must be C-ing things. The large Hatsune Miku sex dolls is just your mind playing tricks on u. OK U got me. Ima Otaku.

    Avatar of Indra EMC
    Comment by Indra EMC
    10:06 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    True, in japan... people often use a laptop or standard branded dekstop PC, usually people who build their own PC with tons of HDD can be describe as otaku, because majority of them think your PC is "Full of weird lolicon hentai movies"

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:56 13/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    I find that offensive. My Sony that I bought at Best Buy is "Full of weird lolicon hentai movies" and I'm not some otaku who builds their own PC.

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:13 18/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    RAID5 is not much better than RAID0 with 3TB same age drives, the instant one fails you get a great chance of any of the others failing too during the rebuild, and you end up losing everything.

    Better go with RAID1, or even with no RAID at all. If you lose one drive, at least it will be only 25% of the data gone, instead of all of it.

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:45 14/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    >4TB 'massive'
    >2 2TB HDDs in RAID0
    lol no. There's nothing reliable about a pair of 2TB SATA drives in a RAID0. And 4TB is not very impressive either.

    4 drive NAS with 4 3TB SATA drives in RAID5 is the way to go. Then when one fails and it will, you don't lose all your sh!t and have 9TB of archival space.

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:31 14/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    or you can just buy one of those massive 4tb external hdds an tuck it out of the way, put all your weird hentai lolicon movies in there and just unplugit when anyone comes, i have a samsung one that even has a switch so i just turn it off.

    Comment by Dark Mage
    05:50 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    A full tower PC that's a stupid one as most laptops are horrid gaming platforms and even worse at video editing.

    Comment by Anonymous
    18:06 18/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    No one knows about this yet?! That they fixed the slow laptop problem in 2011 with the I3/5/7 core 2nd gen technology. I am using a Gate Way Laptop right now. It is crazy fast & I even used ebay to buy it and add the extra brand name internals. Its like remodeling a home and adding an extra bedroom for the new baby & extending the master bedroom for more room to fore play when the kids are at school and I have the day off. Oh I forgot to say I am a trade worker & electrical engineer. So creative building is my Job and I have to have too damn fast technology or I become obsolete. The tools don't make the builder the builder makes the tools & then uses them to make other things.

    Comment by Anonymous
    06:57 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    Hey my laptop is good for video editing ( have edited a lot of promotional vids and so far so good since I can bring it anywhere I want ). Not for gaming platforms though..

    Comment by Dark Mage
    10:06 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    Mostly was due to HD storage constraints and the often weak GPU which is often unhelpful for transcoding.

    Of course so long as the videos are not HD and are fairly short storage and the lack of GPU acceleration probably is not a big issue.

    Avatar of eridani
    Comment by eridani
    06:45 12/03/2013 # ! Drivel (-1.0)

    Any iMac is the way to go.
    Kinda expensive for an ornament, but hey you wanted to please your visitor isn't it?

    Comment by Anonymous
    07:33 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    Sorry, that would repel me...

    Comment by Anonymous
    07:45 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    So it's ok if your date knows that you're homosexual?

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:38 12/03/2013 # ! Neutral (0)

    lmao at ass-pained macfags voting this post down.







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