North Korean Launch Control Quite a Sight

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North Korea may not be able to feed its people, but the grandeur and technological sophistication of its nascent “space” program’s launch control is currently the subject of mass marvel online.

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Similar launch control facilities from around the world:

USA:

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Russia:

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Japan:

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Germany:

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France:

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China:

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South Korea:

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2ch’s self-made PC thread:

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North Korea’s last control facility:

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Their latest one:

north-korean-launch-control-002.jpg

The “rocket” (not to be confused with a prototype ICBM designed to extort more money out of the US) is due to launch soon to celebrate the 100th anniversary of Great Leader Kim Il Sung, and will carry a satellite, doubtless of unparalleled sophistication, into orbit.

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South Korea, Japan and the US all maintain the launch is actually a missile test, and Japan has warned it will shoot the missile down should it come too close, whilst the US has cancelled its “unrelated” 240,000 tons of food aid. There is also considerable suspicion that the state plans to follow the launch with another nuclear test.

Online, the sight of their launch facilities has prompted some less than charitable commentary:

“NASA sure has a thing to learn from this, so compact and efficient.”

“It looks like an elementary school’s PC room…”

“Where are all the people?”

“There isn’t anything on their desks except for monitors…”

“I’d love to know what is in that wooden desk’s drawers.”

“Love that projector!”

“Look at its plugs… pure class.”

“The whole thing is probably a sham.”

“Wait, this isn’t a Photoshop?”

“CNN are showing it, it must be true!”

“They have no intention of controlling this missile once it is launched, do they?”

“Their last control room looked better.”

“Why lab coats?”

“For the look of the thing!”

“The guy on the lower left is watching a picture of himself in the control room on his own monitor. My sides ache.”


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    199 Comments
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    Avatar of kazaza2
    Comment by kazaza2
    12:37 10/04/2012 # ! Quality (+1.0)

    Looks like a movie set for a crappy Ed Wood movie like "Plan 9 From Outer Space". How come they're not wearing silver lame spacesuits?

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:50 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Lol! Yeah, the head scientist is Bella Lugosi.
    If the rocket fails he has a backup plan to create a race of Atomic Supermen!

    Avatar of Noodlestein
    Comment by Noodlestein
    10:47 10/04/2012 # ! Quality (+0.8)

    That satellite looks like something that came out of a university project.

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:23 10/04/2012 # ! Good (+0.7)

    North Korea, one of the few countries in the world that fail worse than China.

    Avatar of yaku
    Comment by yaku
    12:04 10/04/2012 # ! Quality (+0.8)

    More than failing it's like going back in time, they seem to be forever stuck in the 50s or something, and even then a crappy 50s; this must feel goddamn revolutionary for them.

    Comment by Anonymous
    18:49 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    @Naru: Haha...the good old "windy flag" gambit.

    The flagpole was made of aluminum. The vibrations left from planting the flag went through the pole & into the flag. Since there's very weak gravity & no atmosphere on the moon, the flag could stay in an unfurled state for a very long time, vibrating in a way that looks like a slight breeze.

    Comment by Anonymous
    06:28 11/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    there is no such thing as a moon. it's a jewish lie. what you actually see in the sky is a large plywood circle that is nailed to the sky dome. It's all part of a jewish/korean plot to deceive the white race into miscegenation with lower species, such as french and mexicans.

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:08 11/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    @06:28 That is the best conspiracy theory ever devised by man.

    Comment by Anonymous
    16:31 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    @anon 16:08 - Yep, may not have been the first to get a satellite into space, credit to Russia, but USA got to the Moon first.

    Comment by Anonymous
    18:35 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    @ArrowinTheKnee:

    It is a decoy. It's to hide the embarassing fact that the real control room is in someone's garage.

    Avatar of ArrowInTheKnee
    Comment by ArrowInTheKnee
    18:26 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    What if this is just a decoy control room just to fool everyone....

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:47 14/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    A result of the world war 2,the communism influence of china was what cause north korean to become like this.Since they are struck with a useless ideology which didn,t work for china and russian then only death await them.

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:41 11/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    In before this shit blows up on the launch pad.

    Comment by Anonymous

    @Naru
    There is wind everywhere you have atmosphere. Most planets in our solar system have pretty strong winds. Earth is fairly tame in comparison.

    Comment by Anonymous

    The US only got into the space race end of the 50s. You're giving them too much credit.

    Comment by Anonymous

    "USA got in the moon first" c'mon, get real.

    Avatar of Naru
    Comment by Naru

    pfft we all know that was fake there is no wind in space explain that!

    Avatar of Shizu's Waki Obsessor: MaidNiac
    21:43 13/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    Indeed it is. Their satellite just burst out in the sky right after launching it.

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:52 14/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    At least china is still sort of 'alive',north korean is strangling itself to death.

    Avatar of Crim
    Comment by Crim
    15:07 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    Germany has the best control center!

    7 Monitors minimal per person!

    Comment by Anonymous

    你怎么可以这样侮辱中国呢?如过没有中国的话你们日子也不好过!

    RACISTS ARE COMING. BRACE FOR THE DOWNVOTES!

    Comment by Anonymous
    16:15 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Chinese slave labor is awesome! We get cheap computers, they get to live off a couple more soup bones per day. Nice trade.

    Avatar of Gitami
    Comment by Gitami
    14:57 12/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    It's cheaper to outsource than invent more efficient systems. If we don't send it to China we'd probably send it to India, then we'd have posters saying यदि भारत के लिए नहीं हम बहुत सस्ता सामान से अन्यथा संभव हो सकता है का आनंद ले नहीं होगा. Or to Japan.

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:50 14/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    Slave should be quiet,u dont even have any control over your own life,that what a slave is.

    Comment by Anonymous
    15:06 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    I like the South Korean one, looks kinda like a regular lan party. I bet immediately after the launch they'll all start starcraft and duke it out who is boss under them.

    Comment by Anonymous

    lol the Chinese government is here!

    But seriously. I love how a lot of you nationally confused idiots seem to dismiss the fact that your computers are that powerful and cheap because of cheap labour in China. Don't get so full of yourselves.

    Comment by Anonymous

    I agree, for all the "made in China" stuff, we are actually enjoying much cheaper stuff than could otherwise be possible.

    我有同感、如果不是中国的生産力、大家的日子也不好过。

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:52 10/04/2012 # ! Good (+0.6)

    (Seriously) I love the beautiful wooden floors in the NK main control room.

    If you look at this pic (http://img2.sankakustatic.com/wp-content/gallery/cache/133235__468x_north-korean-launch-control-004.jpg), you'll notice in one quadrant of his screen, the guy is watching *other* people, in a *different* control room.

    Watchers watching the watchers?

    (The main control room has wooden chairs; the 'watched' control room has folding metal chairs.)

    Avatar of JasperKazai
    Comment by JasperKazai
    12:56 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (-0.2)

    Who's watching the Watchmen?

    Comment by Anonymous
    15:44 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Um watchmen is actually really good. I guess the message flew over your head there boyo

    Comment by Anonymous
    06:30 11/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    The Watchwatchman.

    I know what you are thinking, but don't ask that or you will receive the recursive curse.

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:43 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    That movie is so fucked up. Please don't watch it people.

    Avatar of Gradius
    Comment by Gradius
    13:09 10/04/2012 # ! Good (+0.6)

    Windows XP spotted!!

    Avatar of Gradius
    Comment by Gradius
    13:11 10/04/2012 # ! Good (+0.6)

    But... will it explodes?

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:28 13/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    If it is made in China, Yes

    Avatar of Gradius
    Comment by Gradius
    13:17 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    Acer monitors! ARGH!

    Avatar of Ihmhi
    Comment by Ihmhi
    20:03 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Taking bets on when it will explode.

    3:1 odds it kabooms on the launch pad.

    5:2 it pulls a Challenger and makes it a couple hundred feet in the air before popping like a bootleg Chinese firework.

    76:1 it falls on its side and rocketsleds across the countryside before slamming into a mountain.

    Comment by Anonymous
    22:46 10/04/2012 # ! Good (+0.8)

    33:1 it "accidently" strays from its path towards SK and "accidently" explodes due to some kind of engine failure.

    132:1 against all odds, it actually launches successfully and goes into upper atmosphere before it mysteriously changes direction.

    849:1 blah blah it flies towards Japan and the so called "Gundam Statue" mobilizes and shoots down the sucker.

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:29 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    I like how Japan seems to have the most outdated equipment out of all of those countries. It shows just how much they care about their nonexistent space program >.>

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:58 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    When it comes to the Space Program things that work all the time, every time are more important than new stuff.

    Comment by Anonymous
    13:52 10/04/2012 # ! Good (+0.6)

    Then why the heck are they using Acer LCDs? =/

    Comment by Anonymous
    14:19 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    @13:52

    I think they can live with newer monitors. I was more of talking about the computers themselves.

    Comment by Anonymous
    16:33 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.4)

    I lol'ed hard at how empty the Japan room was. It looks like no one has been in there for at least 2 decades.

    Comment by Anonymous
    01:34 14/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    It's empty because no one need to be there, the AI already took over the government and the space program!

    Comment by Anonymous
    09:58 11/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    @16:33 Or maybe just 10 minutes because they're all on lunch break.

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:40 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    You can tell a lot about the culture of each country by their launch control room.

    Just look at Germany, one guy per desk with a nice curved row of screens, each desk placed for easy access and pleasing design. China has one guy per screen in a room stuffed full. Japan has no sense of style at all. Russia is going grandiose.

    Comment by Anonymous
    14:18 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    @12:40 No, you can't tell a lot about a "culture" based on their control room.

    Comment by Anonymous

    I would say it's a smart way to save money.

    Comment by Anonymous
    19:34 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    well here come all the amerifag internet commando sooks.

    GTFO NOW!

    Comment by Char
    11:07 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    It looks like a cube sat that last Falcon 9 test carried about six of them with the Dragon capsule.

    Looking at the poor efficiency of this rocket as a satellite launcher it looks to be a modified ICBM test.

    Something intended as a pure satellite launcher would have better stage mass fractions.
    The second stage would be much larger in relation to the first stage.

    Avatar of Crazy_O
    Comment by Crazy_O
    11:09 10/04/2012 # ! Good (+0.7)

    whats up with the german one lol...
    there are like 10 screens 3-5 keyboards and ONE chair infront of the desks.

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:31 10/04/2012 # ! Good (+0.7)

    Well, it's super efficient?

    This is also how I envision Germans playing Eve Online.

    Comment by Anonymous

    a sankaku commenter who plays eve? o.o let's get married now pl0x.

    Comment by Anonymous
    17:05 12/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    Proposal rejected.

    Comment by Anonymous
    05:01 11/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    Yay for gay marriage!

    Comment by Anonymous
    07:28 11/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    LOL well at least he will be happy!

    Comment by Anonymous
    06:19 11/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Fake nerd wanabe poser.

    Avatar of Shizu's Waki Obsessor: MaidNiac
    11:32 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    German's Control Room: Only allows the world's finest and most badass Multi-tasking computer geeks to sit on those seats..

    Comment by Anonymous
    16:35 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    Yes, I will admit Germany builds machine's strong. They can risk multitaskers, because their shit don't explode, it makes other shit explode while still staying strong.

    Comment by Anonymous
    23:38 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    Itz to minimieren ze Number of Turisten and nonteknischen Lookenpeepers! Es war zu much Gefingerpoken und Mittengraben of ze Komputermaschine. Only ze Experten allowengelassen zu watschen ze Blinkenlights.

    Comment by Anonymous
    06:18 11/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    That is so hilarious.

    Comment by Anonymous
    20:27 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    Also they apparently share the desks sometimes:

    http://www.dlr.de/iss/en/Portaldata/1/Resources/portal_news/NewsArchiv2005/col-cc_gesamt.jpg

    Comment by Anonymous
    06:10 11/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    lol @ female scientist

    Avatar of Dia
    Comment by Dia
    23:25 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (-0.2)

    Germans multitask so hard that only women are able to do it.

    Comment by Anonymous
    Comment by Anonymous
    08:00 11/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    Adjutant: Nuclear Launch Detected

    Comment by Anonymous
    15:41 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    it called multibox

    Avatar of Gradius
    Comment by Gradius
    13:21 10/04/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    @11:09

    Never hear of multitask?







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