Pfizer Plans Viagra for Children

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Drug maker Pfizer plans to release a version of its popular aphrodisiac Viagra for children, as a “humanitarian gesture.”

Pfizer intends to release the new drug under the name of “Revatio.” Both Revatio and Viagra use the same active ingredient, Sildenafil. Viagra has been used for years to treat these disorders.

The new version is intended to treat a condition involving abnormally high blood pressure in the lungs of children, which afflicts 600 children a year in the US.

Unsurprisingly for a pharmaceutical company, its motives are thought to be far from altruistic – the US Food and Drug Administration has offered Pfizer a 6 month extension on its Viagra patent in exchange for pushing the drug.

The patent would otherwise expire in 2012, paving the way for a horde of generic manufacturers to copy the drug and make low cost versions available to consumers.

2009 US sales of Viagra were some $1.9 billion – Pfizer can expect sales of its version to plummet as its monopoly is broken and generics take over the market.

At an effective cost of nearly a billion dollars to treat only 600 patients, it appears “erectile dysfunction” sufferers are getting the shaft in more ways than one. Pfizer shares rose 1.7% on the news.

There is conspicuous silence on the matter of Viagra’s primary effects being applied to young children.


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    Avatar of skullkid64
    Comment by skullkid64
    13:23 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (+0.2)

    GREAT!!! just what we need, a pill that'll make ur children horny little basterds. =w=

    Avatar of Shizu's Waki Obsessor: MaidNiac
    13:14 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    The Pill That Changed The World [http://www.historyasia.com/synopsis.aspx?libId=1189&sId=680&sTime=600] Part II

    Beware of Lolipocalypse reverse raep..

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:59 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Is this image from a game or artist?

    Avatar of Meepok
    Comment by Meepok
    12:57 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    The are using 600 children a year as a justification? Seriously?

    Avatar of Barbarian of Gor
    Comment by Barbarian of Gor
    13:44 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    This reminds me of a spoof from the movie "Teachers"
    -skip if ye can't take "spoilers" like a whiny cunt.

    There are two teachers and one of them is really depressed because a stoner kid bit off part of his hand, the nice fleshy chunk between the thumb and forefinger... I don't remember their names, sust call them A (bitey) and B (handsomer younger friend)

    Teach B - "Ok, now this is where I have to cheer you up."
    Teach A - "Look, just let me drink my beer..."
    B - "No, we got the mission to think of. The MISSION."
    A - "Look, I remember it..."
    B - "No you don't so I remind you to cheer you up."
    A - "don't."
    B - "We are on a SECRET mission from the Government. Our duty is to JAIL those rotten little bastards for most of their waking hours. For, if we did not, what would they be doing?"
    A - "Working lousy jobs, partying, what they'll be doing in a few years or when they drop out..."
    B - "Not just that, what else?"
    A - "Boinking..."
    B - "Do not mince words, not boinking, FUCKING.
    A - "Yeah."
    B - "Fucking and Fucking and FUCKING LIKE RABBITS. Come on, with me now."
    A - "Fucking like rabbits."
    B - "you are catching on, now with me..."
    They dance around the coffee table in a circle.
    both - "Fucking and fucking and fucking like rabbits. Fucking and fucking and fucking like rabbits. Fucking and fucking and fucking like rabbits." till they get tired and collapse.
    B - "We are on a secret mission from the government to control the population bomb. For if we do not keep these stupid brats JAILED during the waking moments of their horniest years they will FUCK and FUCK and FUCK and overpopulate America. Then you and I will be turned into Soylent Green to FEED what the slutty girls squirt out of their vaginas. We aren't just underpaid civil servants, we are secret population control agents!!!"

    ------
    Join my group, join MANarchy!!!

    Comment by Tenno Seremel
    14:38 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    And not a single morale crusader smashed it. WTF

    Comment by Anonymous
    16:15 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    So we kill their heart to save their lungs... Nice population's suppression policy.

    Comment by Anonymous
    15:30 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    .... DAMN YOU SHOTA'S!!!

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:54 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    I for one welcome our new loli overlords.

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:19 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    I'm glad that there are some people who can actually read.

    Avatar of PrinceHeir
    Comment by PrinceHeir
    12:29 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    I guess this is only in the US right? oh well i am not surprised

    -______-

    Avatar of Imyou
    Comment by Imyou
    12:49 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Well, that's actually much more like what it was originally intended for - blood pressure issues. This is why you heard of so many seniors dropping dead using it when it came out. Sure, they were exerting themselves having sex, but it's also something you do NOT want to mess up the dosage on or use if you have a heart condition.

    So uh... yeah. That's actually pretty good. I hope no kids get persistent boners and play with them until the skin wears out - it's a nasty thought, but has certainly been known to happen sometimes.

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:33 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Am I the only one who read the title and started laughing?

    Avatar of L
    Comment by L
    19:02 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    NOW INTRODUCING BIRTHCONTROL FOR LOLI'S
    now available in Australia!!!!.....wait thats not right....

    Avatar of Dia
    Comment by Dia
    00:36 31/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    I assume they only sell birth control to women with large enough breasts in Australia.

    Comment by Anonymous
    02:17 31/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    The sildenafil (Viagra® 25, 50 or 100 mg tablets) is used for erectile dysfunction since 1999, and the sildenafil 20 mg tablets (Revatio®) is aprroved for pulmonary arterial hypertension (PAH) since 2005.

    (SINCE TWO THOUSAND FIVE)

    NEWS FAIL.

    Comment by Anonymous
    01:33 31/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    The thing about Viagra is, it was a side product in the search for blood pressure medication which porived very profitable. The active ingredient is the important bit. To say they're giving kids viagra is blowing it out of proportion

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:50 31/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    My Mom works for Pfizer. I can't wait to tell her this~

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:14 31/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    I'm assuming there's going to be a female version of this medicine. Why slip them ruffies when you can slip them something to make them come onto you. This is brilliant!

    Avatar of Dia
    Comment by Dia
    00:35 31/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    It always makes for good headlines when someone uses viagra to treat a child's lung/heart condition or ethanol (alcohol) to save someone who drank methanol. Perfectly valid treatments but the public doesn't know that ;)

    FYI, the generics are coming out in Europe, enjoy your cheaper boners.

    Comment by Anonymous
    20:57 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Companies, elite, and gov/cp can have their way with loli. The common man/lolicon can't.

    Comment by Anonymous
    19:14 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Nothing wrong with this. They extend the patent so they can make a billion extra to pay the costs of a medication that alleviates pulmonary hypertension. Good call of the FDA.

    Avatar of Unlimitedbladeworks
    Comment by Unlimitedbladeworks
    07:28 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Not that surprising really. Sildenafil was originally marketed as a heart medication for adults before they discovered it's usefulness in treating Erectile Dysfunction. It makes sense they would eventually make a children's formulation.

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:29 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    So, like chewable childrens' aspirin, do I have to use twice the listed children's dosage of Revatio to get the ba-ee-ah-gu-ra effect in an adult?

    Comment by Anonymous
    07:49 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Truth is, it does work on lung conditions like that.

    Learned that from Top Gear I did.

    Comment by Anonymous
    07:54 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    HAHAHAHA my company is the advertiser on record for this.

    Comment by Anonymous
    07:23 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    I want my loli back...

    Avatar of EyE
    Comment by EyE
    07:17 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    anddddddd why does the lung condition kidz need a erection.

    Avatar of Entangler
    Comment by Entangler
    07:28 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Even loli needs erection

    Avatar of Schrobby
    Comment by Schrobby
    21:02 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    So loli will turn to futa?

    Avatar of Poof
    Comment by Poof
    09:24 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Simple, Viagra is a vasodilator. It tends to work exceptionally well for penis blood vessels, but it seems to also work for lungs in the case of PAH.

    Avatar of Kortaku
    Comment by Kortaku
    07:05 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    all we need is a really powerful, rich lobbyist group to work for us, and we will have lolimanga in the streets in a year.

    Comment by Anonymous
    07:50 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Or, we use the "cloud" or something, which is simply a bunch of servers in where you can store files on the net, and access them from different locations.

    Let us make the loli-cloud, so that everyone can access their personal loli gallery or a public gallery with the known mangas listed.

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:13 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    and what a paradise would that be.

    maybe we should aid piratebay for a share on their cloud.

    like hell moralists can beat them.

    Avatar of Schrobby
    Comment by Schrobby
    21:01 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Piratebay is one of the last defense lines of freedom.

    Avatar of TehBoringOne
    Comment by TehBoringOne
    07:02 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Hmmm... I remember something about four kids in the UK who took バイアグラ (Oh! Lookee! I triggered a spam filter!) and had huge, painful boners.

    Now, then... That thing affects the cardiovascular system. If used by a minor, could the effects be really ugly?

    This smells like corporate corruption to me... Aided by the US government, no less. Way to go... Fuckers.

    Avatar of Imyou
    Comment by Imyou
    12:52 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Not only did you miss the spam filter bypass, but the article states it's intended to affect the cardiovascular system. Do you really think they'd give it out so kids could get never-ending erections?

    Avatar of Schrobby
    Comment by Schrobby
    21:00 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    That's the main function of viagra. Do you really think it won't work the exact same way for kids?

    Avatar of Imyou
    Comment by Imyou
    11:38 31/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    That's a fantastically marketable side effect of Viagra, actually.

    Avatar of Artefact
    Comment by Artefact

    If you bothered to read the filter you'd find you can bypass it by clicking through...

    Comment by Anonymous
    16:35 01/08/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Since when do users read dialogs?

    Avatar of aarond12
    Comment by aarond12
    07:23 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    That was a pretty inventive way of bypassing the filter, though... props to TehBoringOne!

    Avatar of TehBoringOne
    Comment by TehBoringOne
    07:06 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Maybe next time. =P

    Avatar of Miroku74
    Comment by Miroku74
    11:01 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    I'm surprised you didn't get hit by those filter speedbumps, Artefact while you were writing this article.

    Avatar of Yuki
    Comment by Yuki
    07:01 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    ..and all this is happening while the world is cracking down on loli-philes. Okaaaaayyy ಠ_ಠ

    Comment by Anonymous
    23:51 03/08/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Contrary to popular belief, Viagra is NOT an aphrodisiac. In fact, studies on Viagra show that it has little to no effect on peoples' libido/sex drive (nothing like the magic aphrodisiacs you see in doujins that instantly make someone crave sex; those don't exist either). A large percentage of the 'effects' that people without ED experience are simply placebos.

    I don't get why giving it to children in sufficient dosages is bad.

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:07 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    I didn't see anything like the article mentioned when I googled Revatio. Can someone show me?

    This is creepy as hell that Pfizer is doing this.

    Avatar of TehBoringOne
    Comment by TehBoringOne
    07:05 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    They are just trying to have kids take girls away from lolicon. =P

    Avatar of Schrobby
    Comment by Schrobby
    20:36 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    The femnazis are going to enjoy their shota with mighty boners.

    Comment by Anonymous
    07:25 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    SMART! xDD

    ..but then, what about the female lolicons? D: I predict a rise arrests of female lolicons soon.

    Comment by Anonymous
    15:41 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    apparently some people have very special ideas about what hormones to put inside women.

    Besides, viagra is for erectile dysfunction, not overall lustiness.

    Avatar of Daiyousei
    Comment by Daiyousei
    11:44 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    "Testosterone works in a similar way as viagra to the ladies. Increase their sex drive, sensitivity and lust."

    I'm just going to say that you don't want to be giving girls concentrated testosterone pills. It causes a lot of problems.

    ...Also, lol. "Viagra" is apparently a dirty world or something; the filter warns one when using it.

    Comment by Anonymous
    19:05 31/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Logical thinking I see......

    One of methods of treatment in pulmonary hypertension is by giving nitric oxide (NO), a gas that causes muscles of blood vessels within lungs to relax, thereby reducing the high BP by pulmonary vasodilatation, and hopefully avoiding disasters like cor pulmonale and heart failure.(those children are still too young to die)

    Viagra works by inhibiting enzyme PDE5 (this thing degrades naturally synthesized NO inside blood vessels), thereby promoting vasodilatation and engorgement of blood inside penis. Hopefully same mechanism also will take place inside lung vessels, unlike those in coronary ones (remember this drug is initially designed for treatment of angina and myocardial infarction)

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:09 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    But they're not harming children, they're treating a lung disorder. Did you even read the articel? Certainly they're not doing it out of the goodness of their hearts but it's not like they're doing it for the evulz either.

    'Viagra' was developed for the treatment of pulmonary hypertension and is still used for that purpose.

    Comment by Anonymous
    07:47 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Testosterone works in a similar way as viagra to the ladies. Increase their sex drive, sensitivity and lust.

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:38 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Okay... this is quite corrupt....
    So... people are going after people that haven't harmed children as opposed to something like this? Sure...

    Avatar of NeverSleep
    Comment by NeverSleep
    08:43 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Yeah, but shota-loli is also hot.

    Avatar of Davoh
    Comment by Davoh
    07:17 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    May the Loli-Empire grow stronger with each passing day. Glory to a loli future!

    Avatar of Schrobby
    Comment by Schrobby
    21:04 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Now we need strong aphrodisiacs for loli that also cure common colds or something.

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:53 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    All Hail the Loli-Empire!!!

    Comment by Anonymous
    17:16 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    I, for one, welcome our new Overlolis.

    Avatar of Entangler
    Comment by Entangler
    07:15 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    ha! they want loli to attack you!

    Comment by Anonymous
    11:26 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    lol I imagine a setting where everyday life of a man is a true battlefield for survival.

    The moment you step out of our house, lolis (drugged) are ordered to attack you by parents then sue you for child abuse and demand monetary / property "compensation". Even if a loli is coming on to you by influence of the drug, you hold a weak case of defending yourself from being branded a pedo.

    Its like parents make their kids run in front of cars to get hit on purpose to make you pay. And it ruins you more overall.

    Then while commuting girls will scream at you and accuse you of being an offender. This happens while they slowly strip you of freedom to things you like.

    Im gonna need some gear here,

    Avatar of Schrobby
    Comment by Schrobby
    20:55 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Loli can attack me anytime. ^_^

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:02 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    in soviet russia viagra takes you !

    Avatar of Miroku74
    Comment by Miroku74
    10:59 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    Viagra for kids.... what kind of message is Pfizer trying to sell us here? Aside from, ya know, the one which proves that the US has the best government money can buy.

    I'm quite perplexed at these antics.

    What's next: Jesus Tanks for the Postmortem Impaired?!? >_<

    Avatar of fxc2
    Comment by fxc2
    16:46 30/07/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    So the plan is to draw the blood from the lungs into certain other unspecified reproductive organs instead?

    Yeah, sorry I'm not a physician.





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