Drug maker Pfizer plans to release a version of its popular aphrodisiac Viagra for children, as a “humanitarian gesture.”
Pfizer intends to release the new drug under the name of “Revatio.” Both Revatio and Viagra use the same active ingredient, Sildenafil. Viagra has been used for years to treat these disorders.
The new version is intended to treat a condition involving abnormally high blood pressure in the lungs of children, which afflicts 600 children a year in the US.
Unsurprisingly for a pharmaceutical company, its motives are thought to be far from altruistic – the US Food and Drug Administration has offered Pfizer a 6 month extension on its Viagra patent in exchange for pushing the drug.
The patent would otherwise expire in 2012, paving the way for a horde of generic manufacturers to copy the drug and make low cost versions available to consumers.
2009 US sales of Viagra were some $1.9 billion – Pfizer can expect sales of its version to plummet as its monopoly is broken and generics take over the market.
At an effective cost of nearly a billion dollars to treat only 600 patients, it appears “erectile dysfunction” sufferers are getting the shaft in more ways than one. Pfizer shares rose 1.7% on the news.
There is conspicuous silence on the matter of Viagra’s primary effects being applied to young children.
I’m assuming there’s going to be a female version of this medicine. Why slip them ruffies when you can slip them something to make them come onto you. This is brilliant!
The sildenafil (Viagra® 25, 50 or 100 mg tablets) is used for erectile dysfunction since 1999, and the sildenafil 20 mg tablets (Revatio®) is aprroved for pulmonary arterial hypertension (PAH) since 2005.
(SINCE TWO THOUSAND FIVE)
NEWS FAIL.
The thing about Viagra is, it was a side product in the search for blood pressure medication which porived very profitable. The active ingredient is the important bit. To say they’re giving kids viagra is blowing it out of proportion
My Mom works for Pfizer. I can’t wait to tell her this~
It always makes for good headlines when someone uses viagra to treat a child’s lung/heart condition or ethanol (alcohol) to save someone who drank methanol. Perfectly valid treatments but the public doesn’t know that 😉
FYI, the generics are coming out in Europe, enjoy your cheaper boners.
Companies, elite, and gov/cp can have their way with loli. The common man/lolicon can’t.
Nothing wrong with this. They extend the patent so they can make a billion extra to pay the costs of a medication that alleviates pulmonary hypertension. Good call of the FDA.
NOW INTRODUCING BIRTHCONTROL FOR LOLI’S
now available in Australia!!!!…..wait thats not right….
I assume they only sell birth control to women with large enough breasts in Australia.
So we kill their heart to save their lungs… Nice population’s suppression policy.
…. DAMN YOU SHOTA’S!!!
And not a single morale crusader smashed it. WTF
This reminds me of a spoof from the movie “Teachers”
-skip if ye can’t take “spoilers” like a whiny cunt.
There are two teachers and one of them is really depressed because a stoner kid bit off part of his hand, the nice fleshy chunk between the thumb and forefinger… I don’t remember their names, sust call them A (bitey) and B (handsomer younger friend)
Teach B – “Ok, now this is where I have to cheer you up.”
Teach A – “Look, just let me drink my beer…”
B – “No, we got the mission to think of. The MISSION.”
A – “Look, I remember it…”
B – “No you don’t so I remind you to cheer you up.”
A – “don’t.”
B – “We are on a SECRET mission from the Government. Our duty is to JAIL those rotten little bastards for most of their waking hours. For, if we did not, what would they be doing?”
A – “Working lousy jobs, partying, what they’ll be doing in a few years or when they drop out…”
B – “Not just that, what else?”
A – “Boinking…”
B – “Do not mince words, not boinking, FUCKING.
A – “Yeah.”
B – “Fucking and Fucking and FUCKING LIKE RABBITS. Come on, with me now.”
A – “Fucking like rabbits.”
B – “you are catching on, now with me…”
They dance around the coffee table in a circle.
both – “Fucking and fucking and fucking like rabbits. Fucking and fucking and fucking like rabbits. Fucking and fucking and fucking like rabbits.” till they get tired and collapse.
B – “We are on a secret mission from the government to control the population bomb. For if we do not keep these stupid brats JAILED during the waking moments of their horniest years they will FUCK and FUCK and FUCK and overpopulate America. Then you and I will be turned into Soylent Green to FEED what the slutty girls squirt out of their vaginas. We aren’t just underpaid civil servants, we are secret population control agents!!!”
——
Join my group, join MANarchy!!!
GREAT!!! just what we need, a pill that’ll make ur children horny little basterds. =w=
The Pill That Changed The World Part II
Beware of Lolipocalypse reverse raep..
Is this image from a game or artist?
The are using 600 children a year as a justification? Seriously?
I for one welcome our new loli overlords.
Well, that’s actually much more like what it was originally intended for – blood pressure issues. This is why you heard of so many seniors dropping dead using it when it came out. Sure, they were exerting themselves having sex, but it’s also something you do NOT want to mess up the dosage on or use if you have a heart condition.
So uh… yeah. That’s actually pretty good. I hope no kids get persistent boners and play with them until the skin wears out – it’s a nasty thought, but has certainly been known to happen sometimes.
Am I the only one who read the title and started laughing?
I guess this is only in the US right? oh well i am not surprised
-______-
I’m glad that there are some people who can actually read.
That picture is very misleading in regards to the article itself.
most of you doesnt read the news properly shaaameeee
“he new version is intended to treat a condition involving abnormally high blood pressure in the lungs of children, which afflicts 600 children a year in the US.”
Yeah, but it’s not like we can get boners from thinking about children being treated for medical conditions.
I mean, I presume the rest of you can’t.
Yeah, the rest of the little bastards will be experiencing the joys of prepubescent sex.
Just you wait…. the shit will hit the fan over this.
They ban loli but make kiddies have erections ?
since it the kid edition of viagra, is it going to be teddy bears or dinosaurs ?
It’s gonna be the Penisaur. It’ll speak in sentences ending with “SPURT”
I can imagine a commercial… Female voice in a sweet tone: Does your child have lung problems? Don’t worry. Pfizer, world leading corporation for the treatment of erectile dysfunction has developed a new medication. With this, your child will breathe as if he was on the mountains, enjoying the fresh air only there exists. Male voice: Side effects include an erection in male children. Remember to jerk them two times a day… SPURT.
So maybe it’d be… Shota incest? Whoa…
I can also imagine the situation from a dad’s perspective…
Son: “Dad, my… weewee is… swollen… And the tip is… red! What do I do!?”
Dad: “Easy, son! Do what I do when mom’s not around” *sits him in front of the computer and directs him straight to Sankaku Complex*
Just some random nonsense from the back of my head. =P
Prepare for many new “members”. Heh.
nice one. made me LOL real hard there
So they are giving this to little boys because they want to see they have an erection?
watch this be on the fucking news in a few days
I would just like to say…
This is NOT for kid erections, loli sex, or anything of the sort.
It is basically being re-approved for the use in treating pulmonary arterial hypertension, and in exchange for doing so are getting an extension on their patent. The plus for the government is that now people with PAH can get a new route for treatment, where usually Pfizer wouldn’t go through the process of re-approving it, as it would not return a good profit due to the low number of people with PAH.
What the Fuck???
Exactly!
They don’t realize it yet but I’m betting Pfizer is going to have a major load of shit hit the fan once this happens. This can only be bad.
Viagra for kids! Congratulations industry! You just reached a new level of shamelessness with your sick “make-money-no-matter-what-nor-how” mentality!
When I saw this on Twitter, I thought it was an article on The Onion…
I could see it happening already….Ribvatio a safe alternatives for kids. Side effects: ERECTION!
So wait…viagra for shotas? Before their balls even drop?
Yes!
Brb, preparing for the incoming SHITSTORM. BATTEN DOWN THE HATCHES!
HAHAHAHA my company is the advertiser on record for this.
Truth is, it does work on lung conditions like that.
Learned that from Top Gear I did.
Not that surprising really. Sildenafil was originally marketed as a heart medication for adults before they discovered it’s usefulness in treating Erectile Dysfunction. It makes sense they would eventually make a children’s formulation.
So, like chewable childrens’ aspirin, do I have to use twice the listed children’s dosage of Revatio to get the ba-ee-ah-gu-ra effect in an adult?
Basically yeah
I want my loli back…
anddddddd why does the lung condition kidz need a erection.
Simple, Viagra is a vasodilator. It tends to work exceptionally well for penis blood vessels, but it seems to also work for lungs in the case of PAH.
Even loli needs erection
So loli will turn to futa?
the stockings should be a little bit more shiny
all we need is a really powerful, rich lobbyist group to work for us, and we will have lolimanga in the streets in a year.
Or, we use the “cloud” or something, which is simply a bunch of servers in where you can store files on the net, and access them from different locations.
Let us make the loli-cloud, so that everyone can access their personal loli gallery or a public gallery with the known mangas listed.
and what a paradise would that be.
maybe we should aid piratebay for a share on their cloud.
like hell moralists can beat them.
Piratebay is one of the last defense lines of freedom.
Hmmm… I remember something about four kids in the UK who took バイアグラ (Oh! Lookee! I triggered a spam filter!) and had huge, painful boners.
Now, then… That thing affects the cardiovascular system. If used by a minor, could the effects be really ugly?
This smells like corporate corruption to me… Aided by the US government, no less. Way to go… Fuckers.
Not only did you miss the spam filter bypass, but the article states it’s intended to affect the cardiovascular system. Do you really think they’d give it out so kids could get never-ending erections?
That’s the main function of viagra. Do you really think it won’t work the exact same way for kids?
That’s a fantastically marketable side effect of Viagra, actually.
If you bothered to read the filter you’d find you can bypass it by clicking through…
Since when do users read dialogs?
I’m surprised you didn’t get hit by those filter speedbumps, Artefact while you were writing this article.
That was a pretty inventive way of bypassing the filter, though… props to TehBoringOne!
Maybe next time. =P
..and all this is happening while the world is cracking down on loli-philes. Okaaaaayyy ಠ_ಠ
Contrary to popular belief, Viagra is NOT an aphrodisiac. In fact, studies on Viagra show that it has little to no effect on peoples’ libido/sex drive (nothing like the magic aphrodisiacs you see in doujins that instantly make someone crave sex; those don’t exist either). A large percentage of the ‘effects’ that people without ED experience are simply placebos.
I don’t get why giving it to children in sufficient dosages is bad.
Viagra for kids…. what kind of message is Pfizer trying to sell us here? Aside from, ya know, the one which proves that the US has the best government money can buy.
I’m quite perplexed at these antics.
What’s next: Jesus Tanks for the Postmortem Impaired?!? >_<
So the plan is to draw the blood from the lungs into certain other unspecified reproductive organs instead?
Yeah, sorry I’m not a physician.
I didn’t see anything like the article mentioned when I googled Revatio. Can someone show me?
This is creepy as hell that Pfizer is doing this.
May the Loli-Empire grow stronger with each passing day. Glory to a loli future!
Now we need strong aphrodisiacs for loli that also cure common colds or something.
All Hail the Loli-Empire!!!
I, for one, welcome our new Overlolis.
ha! they want loli to attack you!
Loli can attack me anytime. ^_^
lol I imagine a setting where everyday life of a man is a true battlefield for survival.
The moment you step out of our house, lolis (drugged) are ordered to attack you by parents then sue you for child abuse and demand monetary / property “compensation”. Even if a loli is coming on to you by influence of the drug, you hold a weak case of defending yourself from being branded a pedo.
Its like parents make their kids run in front of cars to get hit on purpose to make you pay. And it ruins you more overall.
Then while commuting girls will scream at you and accuse you of being an offender. This happens while they slowly strip you of freedom to things you like.
Im gonna need some gear here,
in soviet russia viagra takes you !
They are just trying to have kids take girls away from lolicon. =P
The femnazis are going to enjoy their shota with mighty boners.
Yeah, but shota-loli is also hot.
SMART! xDD
..but then, what about the female lolicons? D: I predict a rise arrests of female lolicons soon.
Logical thinking I see……
One of methods of treatment in pulmonary hypertension is by giving nitric oxide (NO), a gas that causes muscles of blood vessels within lungs to relax, thereby reducing the high BP by pulmonary vasodilatation, and hopefully avoiding disasters like cor pulmonale and heart failure.(those children are still too young to die)
Viagra works by inhibiting enzyme PDE5 (this thing degrades naturally synthesized NO inside blood vessels), thereby promoting vasodilatation and engorgement of blood inside penis. Hopefully same mechanism also will take place inside lung vessels, unlike those in coronary ones (remember this drug is initially designed for treatment of angina and myocardial infarction)
apparently some people have very special ideas about what hormones to put inside women.
Besides, viagra is for erectile dysfunction, not overall lustiness.
“Testosterone works in a similar way as viagra to the ladies. Increase their sex drive, sensitivity and lust.”
I’m just going to say that you don’t want to be giving girls concentrated testosterone pills. It causes a lot of problems.
…Also, lol. “Viagra” is apparently a dirty world or something; the filter warns one when using it.
But they’re not harming children, they’re treating a lung disorder. Did you even read the articel? Certainly they’re not doing it out of the goodness of their hearts but it’s not like they’re doing it for the evulz either.
‘Viagra’ was developed for the treatment of pulmonary hypertension and is still used for that purpose.
Okay… this is quite corrupt….
So… people are going after people that haven’t harmed children as opposed to something like this? Sure…
Testosterone works in a similar way as viagra to the ladies. Increase their sex drive, sensitivity and lust.