Top 10 Ways of Looking Cool to Girls
- Categories: Japan, News
- Date: Mar 13, 2010 15:27 JST
- Tags: Comparison, Dating, Fashion, Marketing, Rankings, Relationships
Japanese asked about how best to look cool in front of the ladies yield up a list as bad if not worse than the equivalent list for females, albeit with a notable lack of agreement on anything beyond the basics.
1. Treat girls to things
2. Carry things which are too heavy for her
3. Make flashy plays in sports in front of girls
4. Treat your kouhai [subordinates, etc] to things
5. Sing a ballad at karaoke
6. Gaze off distantly
7. Store up miscellaneous knowledge and suddenly disclose it
8. Undo the top two buttons of your shirt
9. Make sure you have a slanting forelock/bang
10. Languidly loosen your necktie
The rest of the behaviours ranked tended towards clichéd movie scenes and petty displays of virility – offering a coat to a weeping girl or “paying a bill with one payment on your card [as opposed to installments].”
More interestingly, unlike the “how to look cute” ranking for women, agreement on the items amongst respondents to the “how to look cool” ranking petered out almost completely after number 4 – it seems nobody could agree on the meaning of “coolness” beyond a few items of magnanimity and masculine showboating.
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The only sport I can do flashy plays at is WoW. :,(
Try do the number 8 but instead unbutton your trousers...the success chance are low but if successful then... *muahahaha*
#8 should be: Undo her bra with one hand.
ive done that before. a few times.
No need to undo her bra. If you followed #2, you should be holding her breasts already.
^ reasoning doesn't apply to DFC lovers.
Undo her bra ...WITH YOUR MIND!
I usually undo with ctrl+z.
^ Yes, I'm sure your miraculous ctrl+z works wonders with unwanted pregnancy too. :P
#1 and #4 involve money. Why am I not surprised...
It looks more like a list of choices in a eroge
^
don't forget to ctrl+s
using a memory/hex editor can also give lots of cash
lets see how this fairs in /fa/
Number zero: Insert your penor without using your hands. It's not a big thing IMHO, but they REALLY like it.
You may disregard unbuttoning the top two buttons of your shirt if you're FAT or if your ribs' bones are too obvious.
Also, don't do it if you have acne or a lot of hair on your chest.
Hosaka-senpai FTW.
Hosaka-senpai
"HA HA HAHAHAHHA"
Hosaka-senpai is bit over the top...
Hosaka-senpai's top is a bit over...
Or if you usually walk around without a shirt...
Muscle Milk FTW haha!
Since when do trousers have buttons?
^
since levi's 501
1. Treat girls to things
^check
2. Carry things which are too heavy for her
^chack
3. Make flashy plays in sports in front of girls
^I guess I could do that easily enough
4. Treat your kouhai [subordinates, etc] to things
^check, had i any... it's what i'm like
5. Sing a ballad at karaoke
^I can't sing
6. Gaze off distantly
^check
7. Store up miscellaneous knowledge and suddenly disclose it
^check
8. Undo the top two buttons of your shirt
^I undo the top one, because it feels like shit to have it done up... two not so much
9. Make sure you have a slanting forelock/bang
^hair too long
10. Languidly loosen your necktie
^if i had a necktie, i might
i'm a dude and i've been going about with the top button (only the first) of my trousers undone for the last three years or so. it's been a massive hit with the women, no kidding. keep in mind the trousers i wear are usually jeans, and it wouldn't work with that baggy shit.
Curses! Our weak point discovered...
But it just looks so damned tempting ;_;
WoW is a sport? You've gotta be shitting me.
The trained muscles in my front finger could vaporize a warship in an instant.
Sounds deadly, by any chance is your nickname "Spirit_Fingers999"?
Oh! Is THAT what happened to your...er...thing?!
Not sport, but e-sport.
WoW is not an e-sport. Starcraft is.
Try again.
Isn't WoW a e-sport when WCG is going on? I thought they did arena stuff for that.
Ye. 3v3 mainly, usually all RMP...
Wanking of Weiner is a healthy sport in my dictionary.
1. Treat girls to things
should be
1. Threat girls as things
Admit it girls. You prefer bad boys treating you like trash over nice guys treating you good any day of the week...
I agree completely with that, they say that like sensible and romantic guys, but change them without second thoughts for a caveman.
Girls love romance, but if you can't be the big and strong guy she looks to for comfort she's probably out of your league.
I don't have any subordinates Crap =C
Then you suck! I can do some in basketball, soccer, swimming and not to mention hockey as in street hockey and so you suck and die!
then u should train with hinako , u can do it!
Ahahahah yeah, me too
1. ya
2. yea
3. mmm nop, any sports (throw a d20 counts???(?))
4. yep always
5. nop but i play harmonica and e guitah!
6. always!
7. yep and always
8. mmh nan
9. mmh that counts? but yea
10. i dont use it...
i got 7/10 and i cant get any girls o.o that stuff don't work
"The only sport I can do flashy plays at is WoW. :,("
South Korean girls will be fawning all over you if you show them.
OK # 6! I got that in the bag. i hope i can do it well enough to compensate for all the other stuff i cant do
What this list doesn't tell you is that trying to look cool usually end with you looking uncool.
You do know this is "looking cool to girls" for Japanese, rite? Not exactly applicable for the world's population of men...
Problem, brother?
http://animeotaku.animeblogger.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/coolface.jpg
well I got six covered.
I'll have #9 covered in 2 months.
Emo faggot.
#6. Gaze off distantly ... at other chicks without her knowledge while looking cool.
I've got that covered.
10 is 9 far too many. Sadly enough Rule 1 is by far the most concrete approach out of the list. So much for all the "money can't buy me love" crap.
8 covered
11. use enigmatic phrases and big words.
Your #11 is not cool, it doesn't work. You're not trying to have an intellectual conversation with a girl. I'm also not implying that girls are stupid. Appropriately, You want to initiate an interesting conversation with your "target" that will make her comfortable and having her enjoy your presence.
I see, no wonder girls don't like me then! I always end up talking intellectual and correct them if they're wrong... How are we supposed to not correct them?!
stare off into the distance.
6 is just badass
Damit, the secrets out... what now?
...are you sure Meito Anizawa didn't make this list himself?
Nah, if Meito wrote this list he'd include "do exaggerated backflip and crazy action pose (complete with exploding background)" and "get her to buy special edition Anime Goods" ^_^.
i seriously dont understnad 7 but no. 6 is totally the most easiest and most awesome to pull off.
Stating random (useless) facts out of nowhere certainly makes them say things like ''You're so smart!''
No
And furthermore
Fail.
My only Kohai lives very far away. :(
I don't know about "looking cool", but showing her you have money (hence #1 and 4) definitely ties into the whole "ideal husband" thing they have going on there. The actual "cool guys" are working the host clubs women frequent while their husbands are busy working those $60k+ jobs.
The list is about pretending to look cool and not necessarily the same as the husband criteria.
The "cool" dude is the person that the waifu would be cheating with or flirting with. She _already_ got her meal ticket for life in the $60k salaryman hus-has-been that have to go to work 12 hours a day/6 days a week.
I think the actual one goes something like this:
1. Treat her to everything.
2. Have servants carry all her things.
3. Make flashy plays in sports(e.g. drop your wallet full of cash)
4. Buy an apartment for all your underclassmen/juniors.
5. Purchase the entire karaoke branch.
6. Have her gaze at your bank ledger.
7. Store up miscellaneous valuables and suddenly hand it over.
8. Undo the top two buttons made of gold and distribute them.
9. Make sure your hair is well-kempt, preferably by the most expensive hair stylist.
10. Laguidly loosen your necktie, revealing necklaces and jewelry.
Yes. FUCKING YES.
#10 #8 #3 #2
I must be naturally cool since i've always been doing that without even thinking of it.
xD
No.
Do you know me?
Would I lie? Doesn't gain any advantage either way.
"I must be naturally cool", it just the conclusion to this particular article only.
Ladies and gentlemen, i present to you IRL Hosaka-senpai!!!!
Im cooler than him. (if you're a girl)
naturally cool? a nerd that names himself "lolicon x moeness"? please.
I WILL NEVER TREAT GIRLS TO ANYTHING!!!
Treat 2D girls? they are cheaper...
Do you want to look cool or get laid? I think a lot of guys fail because they think being cool will get them laid. Sometimes it works, but usually not. What girls want is attention, where attention = money, time or money AND time.
Gaze of distantly, huh? By the way, the picture doesn't fit though... in a way.
you mean that picture doesn't fit in MANY way, right?
Well, doing #6 in the my country, well...
I kinda do that, you know, I was thinking deeply(for real not for looking cool), well
People think I'm crazy or insane. They say only crazy people do that...
should be renamed to "top 10 ways of looking like a poser faggot"
The "gaze off distantly" can backfire and make you do something not cool. For example walking and gazing not good... pay attention when gazing of frying objects too.
But, in the end money and looks win, in that order.
so does that mean i have to look like hideyoshi just to be cool?
12 Don't pick your nose in front of girls
#2: You are huge. That means you have huge guts.
im not a big fan of the asian look with the freakin long ass fringes long hair = woman. 1 and 2 make u looked whipped so NO!
Unless for the second one, you are capable of taking it to ridiculous extremes to the point of causing onlookers to freak out.
Fail list ...
All cool guys know that you can't look cool
You have to be cool.
Not looking at explosions helps, too.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sqz5dbs5zmo
hahaha awesome XD
Yes, that is the coolest thing a man can do. Continue eating your dinner even when the oven behind you overheats and explodes.
Awesome rofl. I'll make sure to completely ignore all those explosions around me from now on.
I laughed so hard at this I almost wet my pants but I didn't because that wouldn't be cool.
thats apparently not what girls think. your logic is kind of flawed there buddy.
What would girls know???
they don't. but they are the ones to decide you are cool or not, in their point of view
Oh Japan, you and your cliched troll lists.
11. have more bucks she could spend in her life time an she loves u for enternity
The only sport I can do flashy is motor-sports which girls basically hate. =_=
...this made me roflmayo because i'm a girl and I cant stand guys showing off in sports in front of girls. Just turns them into idiots.
6, 8 and 10 also made me rofl.
Picture is win though.
Showing off flashy sports moves is great if you can do it properly.
If you try something flashy/stupid and fail (hand-stand on a moving bicycle... crash!), and a specific girl knows you're showing off to her, sometimes you'll make points ("He was doing it for _me_) with her.
I think this only works if you and she are <= 18 years old, though.
I've never tried it, but watched it work for a guy, once.
#1 : "pay for her shit", how surprising.... :-(
run naked in front of them
...with a gun in your hand in front of the White House, proudly flashing your Johny while waving at her.
i c wut u did thar ^_~.
11. Go Hideyoshi
2. Carry things which are too heavy for her
Don't fall for this guys, girls won't thank you for it and in fact they'll just learn that they can just push you around.
I always see those dumb-struck guys on the streets doing this, only to look like a complete douche.
Then again, not carrying heavy stuff makes you a dick. You need to know the limits and figure out that she's just not that into you.
Hosaka.
I often let my girl hit me. Then i hit her in return. A small comedy fight happen. Then we both hug each other and have sex later. Thats cool huh ?
riiiiight....
japs are so stupid and so lame you cant look cool you need to be born cool....
so.... hope you get better luck next life then.
1 and 4 are there to show girls you have a lot of money to burn
It seems shallowness knows no cultural boundaries......
I'm like most of those naturally, though, and i'm certainly not shallow. I'm too much of a geek to be shallow.
The fact is that this is how to 'look cool' so it'd never be more than shallowness (bar maybe the first two)
#08 I usually only undo one, and basically only to cool myself during hot summer days.. :<
ps: Those hips are too wide for Hideyoshi.. btw.
heres my list.
Have a lot of sakura flowers fly out of nowhere
chew on a piece of wheat
where a jacket as a cape
now that would be awesome
and get you laughed at for being cheesey
Are you sure it's girls you are trying to attract?
the hell?!?! i do 8 of them :/ except the sports i make flashy play is basketball, and no one care about basketball in UK...only dont sing karaoke and wear necktie :/
In Texas, they line up brain liquifying car stereos and beat to death the elderly and disabled across the street to look cool. Beating the eldery and disableds dogs and cats to death as well is the way the try to look cool to girls while they openly deal crack and pot from the yard to street sales. And the girls fall for it.
And you know this...how? Sound fake if you ask me, though the human species has surprised me before.
Would you really want one of THOSE girls?
"9. Make sure you have a slanting forelock/bang"
Emo hair is considered cool??? It just looks retarded to me...
Also where does "looks cuter than a girl while wearing a dress" fit in???
First two are a first class ticket to friend zone.
indeed
Someone accidentally posted the "How to look like a douchebag" top 10 instead...
and as we have seen many a time before...
chicks hookup with douchebags.
no, they hook up with guys with confidence. Not guys who sit alone in a dark room fapping over cartoon children.
Fapping over 3d pigs is better, right? /sarcasm
We're sorry. But you are a 'fail'. Here is your Dork I.D. card. Please keep it with you at all times and have a nice day!
...all but 9 are me.
Well if you have subordinates you look automatically cool.
"1. Treat girls to things
2. Carry things which are too heavy for her"
Too much of that and you'll become her portable handbag... welcome to the friendzone!
portable ATM with over 9000 kg weight limit
Errr, I mostly don't do any of those things. 1 on rare occasions and 6 when I'm bored out of my mind or in deep thought.
Oh well, atleast my right hand still loves me. =(
I'm a master of #6 and #7 :V
1. Treat girls to things
2. Carry things which are too heavy for her
yyyeah, you guys definitely should do this, you will look sooo cool. also ask her if she does not need any help moving furniture, cleaning the house etc.
also i have to wonder, is this top 10 from a Young Teens Japanese magazine, it sound just way too ridiculous .
btw i saw i a guy at collage "Gaze off distantly", i thought he was a retard.
Since it's Japan we are talking about shouldn't number 1 be "having lot's of money"?
Exactly what should I said.
Have much money and almost every women thinks you are cool.
got a new girl last night, simply singing a birthday song to her and that's it.
i wouldn't mind any girl doing the things listed above in front of me. cute girls are so boring.
Gazing off distantly is a sign of being bored, not cool.
I'm not sure to understand the kouhai thing. It's so typically japanese (or asian ?). Why would you look cooler to girls by treating your subordinates ?
You'd be looking uncool instead, because you're spending money on your subordinates that could be "better" spent on her.
5. Sing a ballad at karaoke
I'd rather they mess up and make me laugh XD
11.) Loosen the bandages that conceal your breasts
Daichi-sama~~~
#4? Just no.
#4 isn't cool, it's wasteful.
finally, a competent list, more man-moe!
i change what i said. this list is for girls, meaning they want a slave. but then again, what if cute guy turns out to be otaku? i think we saw they answer to that one a few weeks ago
OOOO I guess I really need to start gathering some subordinates and make the money. Money=shopping=sex for women
This is an appallingly wrong-headed list. 1 and 2 if carefully engaged in might be helpful, the rest just suck. It's as if a 10 year old boy created the list.
No wonder Japanese men can't get sex with women on their own, and have to rely on gang-rape and schoolgirl molesting. Not that there is anything wrong with that.
i do all these things..... and yet i'm still called "cute"..... *sweatdrop*
cause you are not in japan
#8 is ridiculous. Most girls I know find that a turn off.
#6 is surprisingly simple and it works XD
treat them to stuff first but once you nab em they gotta pay *fist pump*
What would the Japanese know about looking cool? Most of them look like geeks, and the ones that look cool wouldn't be sitting at home taking surveys like this.
Does Artefact ever post lone males in the article picture anymore ;_;
Start by not walking around carrying a pillow with your favorite anime character printed on it.
I'm confused...All ten of those things make you a huge faggot.
But I don't like sports. D:
I lol'd hard at 6.
I interpret the above as:
1) Be rich
2) Be their servant
3) Be a winner over other men
4) Entertain them
5) Look good
Summa summarum: Get a chocolate dick that ejaculates money.
Funny story about #5. A few days ago I took my NEET lover to the karaoke box. I sang a lot of songs for him, and he was so moved and inspired that he jumped up and selected a ballad to sing to me!
About 45 seconds later, he was balled up on the couch in the box, crying his eyes out because he couldn't sing it.
It was so moe I couldn't even. Fuck a ballad, I'll take a moe crying NEET anyday...
Weird, when I think of cool I don't think of Karaoke
1. Have a car
2. Have money - The more, the merrier
3. Have a car
4. Have a very good job
5. Be good looking
6. Have a car
7. Be funny
8. Have a car
9. Tell her her flaws make her even prettier.
10. Have a car
Fixed.
Sadly, this one sounds more realistic...
........sad but true.
perfect list here
#1 doesn't sound cool at all. Sounds like a great way to pay her way while she looks for someone with more money to date.
I'm surprised that dressing well didn't figure, or is it so basic that it is number zero on the list?
Who cares about that brah, 3D is pig disgusting.
Lovely Hideyoshi picture there :D!
i do 1 2 and 6 everyday
Shouldn't the title be 'How to loose most of your friends by acting exactly like Hosaka from Minami-ke'?
Or maybe 'A 10 step guide to being a total douche'.
Or the guy that every other guy hates.
Gaze off distantly... at another chick with huge breasts down the street.
What a fucking complete bullshit.
This must've been made by some teknonerds and tested with blond chicks who's iq is under their shoe number.
And just to remind you, their shoe number is in u.s. sizes.
just like the majority of the women you'll hit on anyways.
what the fuck this have to do with me, dipshit?
Oh, sorry, I'm already taken, I don't need some fucking nerd hit-on tips. You can have them, because you seem to be in urgent need for them.
And just to remind you, my gf isn't a blond, does have IQ more than 125 and is all the way so cashy babe I could ever imagine.
10. Languidly loosen your necktie
It will really make any effect?! o.O
3,4,7 and 10 probably attract my attention the best. number 1 isn't far behind, though... numbers 2 and 6 piss me off. 5 will might make me laugh at you.
8 and 9 can get annoying. The less awkward you are the better.
#1 should be undoing her bras by looking at her.
Wait, I thought Hideyoshi is the third gender but not a guy nor a girl. :S
6. Gaze off distantly //Check
8. Undo the top two buttons of your shirt // Does having all buttons undone count as well?
9. Make sure you have a slanting forelock/bang // My bang is so freaking slanted it goes ouside the side of my face about 2cm xD
lol what a geek
Ugh, these all sound cliche and boring. =.=
are you mad that being a complete nerd isn't on the list?
I fucking hate it when guys sing only ballads. Sing something fun so everybody can dance dammit!
Have a gun and smoke some cigs works too...
Just who are the fucking idiots that need a list of "to do" to be cool with the ladys. Go see Doctor Who and mimic the guy ... oh and add a little doctor house in the middle.
Aint I a stinker...
10. Languidly loosen your necktie
At least here in the US, young men don't seem to really wear ties unless it's for an event or part of a uniform/job. If they were more common, I.... I have to admit I'd probably find it cute if a guy fidgeted with his necktie when he was nervous/embarrassed, though. Maybe not cool, but cute.
1. Treat girls to things
Ha, money. No.
2. Carry things which are too heavy for her
I'M A MAYUN! No.
3. Make flashy plays in sports in front of girls
Sports. No.
4. Treat your kouhai [subordinates, etc] to things
Arrange to treat your kouhai i nfront of her? Ha. No.
5. Sing a ballad at karaoke
Ballad, hurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrk.
6. Gaze off distantly
Only if I'm bored out of my skull.
7. Store up miscellaneous knowledge and suddenly disclose it.
ಠ_ಠ That's cool?
8. Undo the top two buttons of your shirt
Suggestively in front of someone you've just met? No, just no.
9. Make sure you have a slanting forelock/bang
Whut.
10. Languidly loosen your necktie
Ties. No.
let me tell you guys why u fails . . .
u keep thinking of getting laid . . .
seriously don't . . .
u guys keep arguing here and never try it out. . .
you over exaggerate the stuffs you do to look cool. . .
i on the other hand am a half-blood otaku. i balance sports and mangas WITHOUT hiding the fact i am an otaku . . . HAHAHAHAHAHA
i'm kind of poor but i keep my fashion tidy and be humble and cool since young . . . (>__<) it might take awhile to adjust yourself now . . .
ROCK MY WORLD ! ! ! hahahaha . . .
and sorry (^__^)/
OOOKKKAAAYYY!!! THAT was just plain weird.
"Half-blood?"
You're either an otaku or you're not. There's no such thing as an in-betweenie.
So much money involved in looking cool. -_-
i think this article is saying "FAKE YOUR ASS OF TO GET LAID >:D" or something like that. i wonder if anyone can even follow all of these rules. im calling this the Cliche list ;D
i think that this list is crap. i mean who didnt already know that this is the obvious way to "get some" ?..i mean didnt we already know all this? its so cliche
i can tell you one thing. i dont like cliche ._.
Isn't this a popular "anime" guy?
I do 1, 2, 6, 7, 8, 9 regularly. The effects? There seem to be girls that like me, but the feeling isn't mutual and vice versa ;_;
Lol! Shoujo manga details!
They forgot number 11: Play the guitar wickedly like Jimi Hendrix.Girls like rock stars.
You could also just be pretending to play it and they would like it all the same.
1. Treat girls to things
- I usually do
2. Carry things which are too heavy for her
- I do for any person that could use the help
3. Make flashy plays in sports in front of girls
- I guess I could if girls watched the sport I practice [Muay Thai]
4. Treat your kouhai [subordinates, etc] to things
- Only if the kouhai needs it
5. Sing a ballad at karaoke
- My voice sucks, so no
6. Gaze off distantly
- lolwut
7. Store up miscellaneous knowledge and suddenly disclose it
- I never do if it's got nothing to do with the conversation
8. Undo the top two buttons of your shirt
- Nope, makes me look like a drunk
9. Make sure you have a slanting forelock/bang
- Nop, I like my hair short
10. Languidly loosen your necktie
- Sometimes do
Getting girls in Japan must be easier than I thought.
it's lazlo from suikoden.
wut the hell is Hideyoshi doing headlinning this topic??!!!
Do chicks actually prefer traps over manly men?
Oh gawd what is the world coming too????
o.<*!!!
What is missing from the list is - not smoking, Women totally dislike seeing guys puffing away on cigarettes.
i am sure there are bettah ways to look cool to a lady.....anyways thats in japan.
Hideyoshi doesn't look cool at girl 'cause He looks like a cool girl