Japanese Marriage, According to Google

idol-master-yuri-marriage-kikuchi-makoto-and-hoshii-miki

Google’s search auto-suggest feature provides some despair inducing insights into the nature of Japanese matrimony, seemingly encapsulating the institution in disturbing detail…

The suggestions themselves are thought to be based on Google’s database of search terms frequently occurring together (although Google is known to censor these quite heavily to remove anything it considers unseemly). Enterprising 2channelers soon found some interesting results by inputting “husband” and “wife.”

Firstly, the English language results for Google.com by way of comparison:

google-husband

google-wife

The suggestions for Google.co.jp in translation (due to Japanese grammar and sentence structure the wording is altered slightly to make sense):

google-japanese-husband-wife

For “husband” (夫 / otto):

[I want my] husband to die

[I hate my] husband

Husband average pocket money (see here)

Husband verbal violence

Husband pocket money

[How to address] husband

Husband death procedure

Husband depression

Husband unemployed

Husband death pension

Very similar results can be found for “danna,” a word typically used by wives to address their husbands.

For “wife” (妻 / tsuma):

Wife birthday present

Wife birthday present ranking

Wife present

Wife hysteria

[How to address] wife

Wife depression

Wife present ranking

Wife kenjougo (a type of humble speech, traditionally used by wives to address husbands)

Wife common law marriage

Wife shochu (a type of rice liquor)

Anyone thinking about marrying a Japanese woman might be well advised to think long and hard about these results…

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