Hentai Professor Groped Thousands of Breasts Using Logic

breast-groping-prof.jpg

A university professor (62), who taught logic, over a twenty year period called over a thousand of his female students to his office, where he would beguile them with logic into allowing him to fondle their breasts.

He used the same argument each time, and only recently did a student manage to see through it, resulting in his arrest.

His technique was bizarre, but highly logical:

First the professor would call his chosen students to his office, for a lesson in logic:

“I can touch you without laying so much as a finger on you” he would say.

The perplexed students would naturally tend to respond “Impossible.”

If they did, he would follow through with “If I can’t do it, I’ll give you ¥1,000.”

If the student agreed to the “wager”, he would immediately pull out his wallet, hand them a ¥1,000 note, and then begin brazenly fondling their breasts.

Those students who complained of sexual harassment or worse, he would silence with the following line of argument: “As you in fact gave verbal assent to the contract and accepted the ¥1,000 fee, the contract is complete. It’s meaningless to try to take this to court.”

He continued this same tactic for some 20 years without issue, and his victims are thought to number over a thousand. None it seems could overcome his logical arguments, or possessed knowledge of the fact that illegal contracts are unenforceable.

Only recently it seems did a student actually bring this to the attention of the proper authorities; he was soon arrested on charges of indecent assault.

Police are scathing, and are look at adding as many charges as they possibly can: “He abused his knowledge of logic to undertake this dastardly scheme.”

Via (the very dubious) Kyoko.

This unfortunate career of minor infamy certainly place the professor’s reputation in the gutter, but we must also wonder at either the intelligence, or the virtues of his student victims.

Buying his line says little about their wits, whilst settling for a bargain basement groper’s fee of 1,000 also says even less about them…


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    Avatar of twin blades
    Comment by twin blades
    09:43 15/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    as wrong as it was to do they shoud just let it go I know it seems wrong but come on the guy is like 1000

    Avatar of Halconnen
    Comment by Halconnen
    10:38 15/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Somewhat disappointed, the headline actually made me expect some kind of awesome rocket science.

    Now I don't know how good a translation 'touching without using fingers is', but the concept is kinda dumb.

    If he knew what he was doing, he could've made the bet, then rub their breasts with his forearms, feet, or whatever other bodypart he wanted (cough) and then walk away while keeping his money. If that had worked thousand times that might actually have been worth a round of applause.

    Otherwise it's just a somewhat (un?)cleverly wrapped "Will you let me touch you for 1,000 yen?" (Which might have yielded a similar success rate with less risk of legal repercussions depending on how and where he does it (and on his looks, probably.))

    Comment by BuggyBY
    08:48 15/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    I am the bone of my logic.
    Arguments are my body, and ¥1,000 notes are my blood.
    I have groped over a thousand breasts.
    Not known to police.
    Nor known to university administrators.
    Have withstood fallacy to grope many boobs.
    Yet those arguments will never pass logical scrutiny.
    So as I pay, Unlimited Boob Gropes.

    Comment by Anonymous
    Comment by tony-kun
    04:03 19/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    lol :) so actually archer was a pervert!?

    Comment by Anonymous
    18:46 29/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Archer was a born genius. We all know that.

    Comment by Anonymous
    12:39 15/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    THIS MAN MUST TEACH ME HIS WAYS

    Comment by Anonymous
    19:52 17/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    You may think this it's really hard to fall in this trap. If you were to a have a strong mind you can manipulate people easily, it's kinda like the law of attraction. (The Law of Attraction is used in occults that are ran by many people who belong to our gov't)
    This is why hypnotists are very tricky. If you were to understand how The Law of Attraction works perfectly, it would then be impossible to fall into any scam, murder, accident ect.
    The only rule about the law of attraction is not to think negatively over anything.
    If he was worried about what he was doing, and that he might go to jail.... Right there is braking the law of attraction, there fore he would have a really high chance on getting caught.
    The Law of Attraction is a universal law used by many of our leaders, and even many famous people.
    It can grant fame and fortune at the cost of nothing.
    If you were connected to one of the 13 main bloodline of Royalty, you would know everything about this.

    Comment by yan+tsun
    23:11 15/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    his ways are a path to enlightenment!!

    Comment by SnooSnoo
    19:00 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    "Police are scathing, and are look at adding as many charges as they possibly can"
    They are counting how many medals to award to him?

    Comment by zipang
    19:30 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    that's an old trick...

    I used to do this in high school, it was so LOL.

    Well I got slapped in the face many times too, they would not listen to my reasoning T_T too bad...

    Avatar of Aoshi_88
    Comment by Aoshi
    17:49 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Oh, someone threw reason out of the window.

    Comment by nanashi
    17:16 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    hey guys
    kyoko shimbun is famous joke site

    Avatar of Artefact
    Comment by Artefact
    18:10 14/01/2009 # ! Astronomical

    Sort of like the Onion, but more realistic...

    Comment by Largo
    20:07 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    I wish I could be him. Maybe I will try calling over some of my female coworkers to my office right now!

    Comment by Firo
    23:02 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    So~ educational!! XD

    Comment by Anonymous
    23:39 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Gee, another case? AGAIN? *rolleyes*
    Yeah, so that makes it, what? 20 odd cases being posted on SC in less than 1 year. That is certainly amazing...... >.<

    Comment by Chou
    21:34 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    What most Americans are failing to realize here is that in Japanese society, only recently have sexual assault cases been taken care of properly. In the past, even if the woman won the case, she was still ridiculed, and became a social outcast, sometimes even within her own family. Still, very few sexual assault cases lead to any sort of punishment for the criminal, but instead the person being assaulted is ridiculed for putting herself in that situation, even if there was no way she could know that was going to happen.

    In the U.S., we still have some cases where the case is not handled properly, but it's becoming more and more rare. So, what we think is a common sense issue with sexual assault is not necessarily true in Japan.

    After all, in a country where you are almost always surrounded by people, social standing is one of the most important things to consider, and someone who reported the professor in this situation could have her social standing reduced to the point to where she can't get hired for most positions due to the scandal the case would cause.

    Avatar of Artefact
    Comment by Artefact

    Orientalist claptrap. Sexual assault is prosecuted extremely vigorously in Japan, and people view the victims of such with as much sympathy as anywhere else.

    Comment by Chou
    13:11 15/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Well, it certainly seems as if you have never lived in Japan as a woman, or known any woman in Japan who was a victim to sexual assault. They are getting better, but there are still a lot of cases where the victim is victimized further by the justice system and the society.

    Comment by Anonymous
    22:34 17/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    hahaha that was hilarious

    Comment by trav1085
    09:57 23/03/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    too bad this is a fake news story lol

    on the article right next to the title on kyoko it says "this is fake news desu"

    but you see, they change the text colour to white so you can only see it if you highlite it lol

    this is what it says

    " セクハラ教授を逮捕 1千人以上の胸触るこれは嘘ニュースです"

    english: perverted teacher arrested, over 1000 gropings This is fake news

    Comment by Anonymous
    05:18 10/06/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Distinguished Prof. in Oppai lol

    Comment by SirLoine
    Comment by kabukicho2001
    11:56 28/02/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    That teacher possiblely was in Peru. There was a engineer at inictel where he could learn all that fuck behavior with girls. There was a japanese that has a "mekake" in Huaral Lima Peru. He comes to Peru one or twice a year to visit her.

    Avatar of drastikhate
    Comment by Dee
    14:47 15/03/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    whats a mekake.

    Comment by Anonymous
    01:21 15/07/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    “I can touch you without laying so much as a finger on you”

    I can do that for real, I just use the palms of my hands and don't touch with the fingers, or use some other part of my body. Of course he might not have formulated it this exact way in Japanese.

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:05 06/07/2012 # ! Neutral (0)

    far too expensive....

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:49 06/03/2010 # ! Neutral (0)

    This is how nerds can be almost as dangerous as jocks.

    Don't trust smart people if you are not...

    Comment by Anonymous
    10:33 28/10/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    I have newfound respect for Japanese professors.

    Comment by Cerenado
    14:57 04/02/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Good ol' simple logic.

    Comment by Anonymous
    04:22 19/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Using logic to make girls let him grope them? Spock will be proud.

    Comment by tony-kun
    04:00 19/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    wow! now we need forceable illegal contracts!

    Comment by Lord Zero
    08:43 27/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Using Logic 4 Lolis!!!
    This guys is my hero.
    Geez, im a scientist, but never though before of
    this myself.
    Gotta try it...

    Avatar of h8GWB
    Comment by H8gwb
    14:06 31/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    At first, I thought the news was "They're letting professors teach hentai now?".

    Comment by Anonymous
    Avatar of vin-nii
    Comment by Tno
    15:16 28/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    lol, if this was in America, that guy would have been shot dead on his 10th try ;D

    Comment by kenjiharima
    16:22 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    What?! Another Blackmailing teacher from an eroge in real life? =_=

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:41 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    What logic has done?

    Comment by Spoony Bard
    08:33 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Haha, this guy's a genius!

    Avatar of Chris
    Comment by Chris
    10:50 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Brb guys, going to become a logic professor

    Avatar of kajunbowser
    Comment by KajunBowser
    08:29 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Logic 069: The Logic of Ero-Persuasion ^__^

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:20 15/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    No, no, you won't need fingers for 69 ^__^

    Comment by Anonymous
    08:54 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    As the students should have perceived, the logical error is more basic than the error in legal reasoning.

    If not-P then Q
    Q
    Therefore not-P

    Does not follow.

    I'd make sure my tutees knew that... but I don't teach logic. I teach ethics.

    Avatar of ED
    Comment by EvilDevil
    09:09 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    we need to study his technique, for science!!!

    Comment by Faulty Logic is Faulty
    09:09 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    X = I can touch you without laying a finger on you.
    Y = I will give you ¥1,000.

    Premise 1: If NOT-X, then Y.
    Premise 2: Y.
    Prof's Conclusion: NOT-X.

    Logical fallacy via affirmation of the consequent. Professor fails.

    Comment by Anonymous
    00:26 15/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Well, we obviously don't know what he really said verbatim (or literally translated). He "should" of course have touched them, then said, "oops, looks like I've failed and you win the 1000 yen." I put the "should" in quotes, because what he really should have done is not do that kind of thing. And if he has indeed given them the 1000 first and then proceeded to fail the bet on purpose, he should get an additional charge for misrepresenting the very topic he teaches.

    Avatar of giascle
    Comment by iapfah
    10:19 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    I was thinking the same thing. Cause and effect are not interchangeable.

    Comment by mortified
    10:58 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    it seems to me though that he's saying that because he can't touch them without laying his fingers on them he'll pay them 1000 yen to touch them

    Avatar of giascle
    Comment by iapfah
    11:17 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    Which is essentially saying the same thing, but backwards.

    Comment by Endz
    09:03 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    So how did he touch them without laying a finger?

    Comment by PedosRus
    15:44 14/01/2009 # ! Neutral (0)

    he did touch the breasts with the fingers,
    he would rather give the thousand away for the breasts ^^





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