A man (42) who visited a park in the dead of night to engage in nude exercise, and then decided to have sex with some park furniture became trapped in the attempt, we hear. His member became so engorged with blood that he could no longer withdraw himself; it took all the efforts of emergency services to release him.
The man seems to have been inspired whilst engaged in a spot of nude midnight exercise; he visited the park at 11pm, stripped off all his clothes for some reason, and began exercising vigorously. He became excited. Seeing no option but to relieve his tension using the very fixture he was excersing on, he lay on it and inserted himself, and thence became trapped.
The fixtures in question were established some years ago in order to perform sit-ups on; each plate was made of iron, being 180cm by 60cm, and they were perforated with holes of some 3cm in diameter to allow drainage of rainwater…
Realising the potentially emasculating, and definitely agonising nature of his plight, he cried desperately for assistance, and eventually the fire brigade was summoned to render aid, which they did promptly (pictured above).
It was not so simple as this however; he could not be withdrawn due to the swelling, and in his agonies there was apparently little they could do for him other than tie him down and wait for medical assistance. Medical personnel soon arrived, and administered painkillers, and an ice pack to his member; this eventually allowed his excitement to subside, and for him to be evacuated to hospital.
But his ordeal did not end there – the man begged witnesses not to take pictures (which we see here), and not to take his name (his name was released in the original report), saying “I won’t be able to look people in the eye again! I’ll not be able to find a job!” The Hong Kong media gleefully reported all these details.
In the end, he was trapped in the park furniture for well over an hour, and when his engorgement eventually showed signs of subsiding, the firemen cut his partner loose with hacksaws, and with ten men carried them both to away to be hospitalised.
A little blood was all that was left of his encounter with the park. We do not hear what became of his partner.
Via Heaven. Chinese source.
An imaginative use of park furniture, though disturbing questions are raised. Why did he feel the need to undress? Why did he choose a hole in a park when he could have likely made his own uncomfortable 3cm hole anywhere else with no risk? Was it the spur of the moment? Most pressingly, how did he fit himself into such a small hole?
ಠ_ಠ
Maybe he was drunk, or high, or something.
We can but hope…
he could exercise while he was drunk?
Or simply he just love this park so much that…
……….what?
agreed…..what?
again…..what?
Wait… What?
what?
NOBODY BROKE THIS COMBO!
What combo?
Combo… what?
didn’t understand that…what?
There’s a combo?
Sadly you brake it ;-;
Ha ha ha ha ha……
hillarious.
Damn that sounds painful. I don’t see how the hell it happened. But damn it sounds painful.
OMG that was so funny!!
Well, human sometimes have inner desire that need to release it. At least we know from his action that, park furniture is a bad idea.
Again, makes me wonder? since he is in HK… getting a hooker should be easy isnt it? Why the park furniture? My my… Mental imaginary is definitely a dangerous thing.
There goes his manhood, and his dignity. But still, I’d rather not embarass/destroy a man with a “different” fetish. Everyone has a different “preference”, but (agrees with above) why park furniture? In b4 rule 34 on park furnitur… w8, He just started it.
just weird
omg that was hilarious! i do love the way you wrote this article.
my condolences for the guy and his manhood. he doesn’t deserve the ridicule he’s getting, he was simply answering the call of nature afterall. what’s to stop a man from satisfying his inner desires?
I never knew such “American Pie” antics could happen in real life. I do not know which is worse, getting your hand suck to your privates with super glue or this.
.. and thats why god invented the women.
Thank you God!
It takes a little more effort to get her to let you stick it in (sometimes, heheh), but when set against getting stuck in a park bench… well… I think the choice is obvious at this point.
Yes, God invented women just for you to stick your dick in.
Fucktard.
I’m not sure but I heard that that guy was caught by triads (or loan shark?), forced his still insertable thing into the hole and had him swallow viagra(R).. as the result, ultimate lock of agony (and embarassing too!). perhaps somebody can verify this?
best freaking way to make people pay if that is true!
Best to stick to vacuum cleaners in future, I think.
Man, I feel really bad for him… :(
I’d like to see his face when fireworkers get down of their truk with the axes in hand.
real funny amazed
hahahhahhahahhahahhahhahahhahhahahhahahhahahhahahhaha
End makes no sense! Either the swelling subsided and they got him to pull out OR *gulp* they cut his ‘partner’ off.
On a different note, anyone notice how the fireman in the middle in the back is TOTALLY cracking up?! Haha!
when his engorgement eventually showed signs of subsiding, the firemen cut his partner loose with hacksaws
The ‘partner’ here could be this park furniture as well
Anyway, good for him. He’s a stupid fuck and I dont care about him.
I’m from HK, in the article, the man’s partner means the park furniture, the fire men cut it off and send them to hospital.
btw, not only the fireman, but also the newsreporter crack up,too.
WE EVEN GOT A THEME SONG FOR HIM:)
wow, great, I want to here that.
this is kinda wrong for many reasons……….
Trapped in a park hole…ohhh god. I went lol for minutes.
I could see that guy dressing as a woman in the future and thereby declaring that he’s a trap. XD
I majorly lol’d.
Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
the mass media has always done a great job for us, they’re just awesome